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Worried about our red flags! PLEASE HELP. Spouse sponsorship.

Cypher909

Full Member
Mar 28, 2021
29
8
Hi everyone!

My common-law spouse and I (both of us are female) are living in Canada and planning to apply for spousal sponsorship in July, which is when we will have lived together for a year. We started dating in November 2019. So we will have lived together for exactly a year when we apply, perhaps one year and one month if we apply in August. Our relationship will be 3 months short of 2 years by that time.

I am a 28F Canadian citizen and Caucasian. She is 38F, Filipina. Exactly ten years older than me. That is the first red flag I can think of. The second is that she is Filipina and I am Caucasian (worried this may be seen as a cultural difference). However, we are both Roman Catholic. We don’t have a language barrier as she speaks English quite well and I am learning Tagalog.

We met in Canada at our mutual workplace. We started hanging out shortly after she was hired.

I know it’s a red flag if the woman is older but thing thing is, WE ARE BOTH WOMEN. So is that still a red flag?

I feel sick to my stomach thinking I could lose her because an immigration officer may not be satisfied our relationship is genuine.

We have lots of proof of cohabitation and genuine relationship. She has status here until November and I am freaking out at this point. I don’t wanna lose her, she is the love of my life

Our proof is:

  1. Lease agreement from July 2020 with both of our names
  2. all of our rent receipts since July 2020 with both names
  3. Amended lease agreement from March 2021 because our landlord switched us from “utilities included” to “utilities not included” (we now have joint utilities together and a letter from the landlord informing us of the change of lease terms)
  4. A letter from our landlord stating that we have been living there together since July 2020 with both our names
  5. Joint bank account with statements dating from July 2020 with our address
  6. Our separate credit card statement with our address (also July 2020)
  7. Documentation that she was added to my Mastercard
  8. multiple pieces of mail and Amazon receipts from July 2020 onward addressed to her and to me with our address on it
  9. we both have life insurance policies that list each other as beneficiary
  10. receipts for furniture we purchased together last summer with both names and our address
  11. literally hundreds of photos together (most are selfies but we have many from outings with my family as well such as Christmas and birthday dinners and in all our photos together we are touching) but we won’t submit hundreds just 20-30 as stated in the guidelines
  12. letters from my mom and my aunt to attest to the genuine nature of our relationship
  13. letters from our mutual friends to attest to the genuine nature of our relationship
  14. proof that I bought her a diamond ring to propose to her
  15. Valentine’s and birthday cards we’ve purchased for each other
I am probably certainly forgetting some stuff but I am in an absolute panic. I don’t want to lose her and I’m so scared that she’ll have to leave because we will be rejected. We are marrying next year and we booked a big venue and we plan to have a baby through IVF the following year. I don’t want our plans to be ruined and I don’t want my love to go back to the Philippines. I’m crying because I’m so scared this isn’t going to work out for us because of a silly age gap even though we are so similar.

My whole family knows her well and loves her. They would all agree that they've never seen me happier before. I've not met her family in person because I have never been to the Philippines, but they are aware of our relationship and have interacted with me on FaceTime.

We are going to contact an immigration lawyer to have our file reviewed before we submit it in July/August. I'm terrified of having an interview because it could extend this process for years and her daughter lives in the Philippines with relatives (there is no dad; he abandoned 11 years ago when she found out she was pregnant, so the birth certificate only has my spouse's name as a parent and 'abandonment' or something like that where the father section is) and it breaks my heart to think she won't get to hug her daughter for potentially years.

Please tell me what you think. Is it likely we will be contacted for an interview? Or do you think we have solid proof and they’ll overlook our interracial relationship and our 10 year age gap?
 

armoured

VIP Member
Feb 1, 2015
15,472
7,876
I am a 28F Canadian citizen and Caucasian. She is 38F, Filipina. Exactly ten years older than me. That is the first red flag I can think of. The second is that she is Filipina and I am Caucasian (worried this may be seen as a cultural difference). However, we are both Roman Catholic. We don’t have a language barrier as she speaks English quite well and I am learning Tagalog.

We met in Canada at our mutual workplace. We started hanging out shortly after she was hired.

I know it’s a red flag if the woman is older but thing thing is, WE ARE BOTH WOMEN. So is that still a red flag?
...
Please tell me what you think. Is it likely we will be contacted for an interview? Or do you think we have solid proof and they’ll overlook our interracial relationship and our 10 year age gap?
I don't think anyone cares about any interracial aspect at all here. Age gap - not that enormous and context doesn't seem odd.

"Intercultural"? You met at work, you speak the same language, dont' see much issue.

Wont' predict but don't think you need to worry quite so much; doesn't sound at all unusual and neither sound like red flags, really.

One thing you didn't note - her status in Canada. For the obvious reason that if the relationship is to get status, more scrutiny. But the rest of your relationship proofs sound like there.

I didn't look through your list of proofs in detail. Presume you can't get married (because PH divorce issue). I'd be more worried about demonstrating your common law with specific starting date - technicalities can hang people up. But it sounds like you're organised and documenting carefully.

You do know to declare the child as dependent and what's required for that, I assume.
 
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Mjg0503

Star Member
Mar 20, 2019
148
64
Hi everyone!

My common-law spouse and I (both of us are female) are living in Canada and planning to apply for spousal sponsorship in July, which is when we will have lived together for a year. We started dating in November 2019. So we will have lived together for exactly a year when we apply, perhaps one year and one month if we apply in August. Our relationship will be 3 months short of 2 years by that time.

I am a 28F Canadian citizen and Caucasian. She is 38F, Filipina. Exactly ten years older than me. That is the first red flag I can think of. The second is that she is Filipina and I am Caucasian (worried this may be seen as a cultural difference). However, we are both Roman Catholic. We don’t have a language barrier as she speaks English quite well and I am learning Tagalog.

We met in Canada at our mutual workplace. We started hanging out shortly after she was hired.

I know it’s a red flag if the woman is older but thing thing is, WE ARE BOTH WOMEN. So is that still a red flag?

I feel sick to my stomach thinking I could lose her because an immigration officer may not be satisfied our relationship is genuine.

We have lots of proof of cohabitation and genuine relationship. She has status here until November and I am freaking out at this point. I don’t wanna lose her, she is the love of my life

Our proof is:

  1. Lease agreement from July 2020 with both of our names
  2. all of our rent receipts since July 2020 with both names
  3. Amended lease agreement from March 2021 because our landlord switched us from “utilities included” to “utilities not included” (we now have joint utilities together and a letter from the landlord informing us of the change of lease terms)
  4. A letter from our landlord stating that we have been living there together since July 2020 with both our names
  5. Joint bank account with statements dating from July 2020 with our address
  6. Our separate credit card statement with our address (also July 2020)
  7. Documentation that she was added to my Mastercard
  8. multiple pieces of mail and Amazon receipts from July 2020 onward addressed to her and to me with our address on it
  9. we both have life insurance policies that list each other as beneficiary
  10. receipts for furniture we purchased together last summer with both names and our address
  11. literally hundreds of photos together (most are selfies but we have many from outings with my family as well such as Christmas and birthday dinners and in all our photos together we are touching) but we won’t submit hundreds just 20-30 as stated in the guidelines
  12. letters from my mom and my aunt to attest to the genuine nature of our relationship
  13. letters from our mutual friends to attest to the genuine nature of our relationship
  14. proof that I bought her a diamond ring to propose to her
  15. Valentine’s and birthday cards we’ve purchased for each other
I am probably certainly forgetting some stuff but I am in an absolute panic. I don’t want to lose her and I’m so scared that she’ll have to leave because we will be rejected. We are marrying next year and we booked a big venue and we plan to have a baby through IVF the following year. I don’t want our plans to be ruined and I don’t want my love to go back to the Philippines. I’m crying because I’m so scared this isn’t going to work out for us because of a silly age gap even though we are so similar.

My whole family knows her well and loves her. They would all agree that they've never seen me happier before. I've not met her family in person because I have never been to the Philippines, but they are aware of our relationship and have interacted with me on FaceTime.

We are going to contact an immigration lawyer to have our file reviewed before we submit it in July/August. I'm terrified of having an interview because it could extend this process for years and her daughter lives in the Philippines with relatives (there is no dad; he abandoned 11 years ago when she found out she was pregnant, so the birth certificate only has my spouse's name as a parent and 'abandonment' or something like that where the father section is) and it breaks my heart to think she won't get to hug her daughter for potentially years.

Please tell me what you think. Is it likely we will be contacted for an interview? Or do you think we have solid proof and they’ll overlook our interracial relationship and our 10 year age gap?
It sounds like you have more than enough proof of the genuine nature of your relationship. The proof you are providing is much more than is required or common. I don't know if you will be asked to do an interview, but even if you are, I would say there is nothing to fear. I feel your pain at the very thought of losing someone so important to you. Please know that the odds of that happening are extremely slim, especially given your extreme diligence in submitting mountains of proof. My guess is that your immigration lawyer will be impressed to the point of wondering why you contacted him/her.
 

armoured

VIP Member
Feb 1, 2015
15,472
7,876
I didn't look through your list of proofs in detail. Presume you can't get married (because PH divorce issue). I'd be more worried about demonstrating your common law with specific starting date - technicalities can hang people up.
My apologies, I now see that you are planning to get married. I also missed that you referred to her status.

You could consider getting married before applying - unlikely a small civil ceremony would be an issue in covid time, and have whatever larger event to celebrate your union at your convenience in future. It would allow you to apply earlier as well.

Note, I am not saying that your common law proofs will not pass muster. But it changes the analysis for IRCC - you have the legal proof (marriage certificate) and the rest of your documentation becomes evidence (strong evidence by the looks of it) of your relationship and living together. And some common law applications do get caught up on technicalities or asked for more evidence, especially when living together is just meeting the one-year cohabitation test. In a sense it switches the burden of evidence to just the relationship aspects (using this phrasing loosely, not in any formal legal sense).

This is entirely your choice though, and I can't say for certain it will make things quicker or easier (except for being able to apply sooner), or possibly only at the margins.

And to return to your main question, based on what you've shown, overall your 'red flags' don't really seem to be such.

Good luck.
 
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Naheulbeuck

Hero Member
Aug 14, 2015
315
191
...

Please tell me what you think. Is it likely we will be contacted for an interview? Or do you think we have solid proof and they’ll overlook our interracial relationship and our 10 year age gap?
Like others have mentioned, the red flags you thought would be red flags are not really, the two big things to consider is whether you can prove your relationship and whether you can reassure the officer that the relationship was not entered into for the principal purpose of acquiring immigration status in Canada.

You have all the strong proof they would be looking for:
Lease agreement with both names, life insurance with other as beneficiary, shared bank account. Those 3 things are just exactly what you need to avoid scrutiny where trying to prove the relationship, the other proofs are really mainly for people who don't have some of the 3 listed above.
As to the question of whether the relationship was entered into to gain some immigration status, it is very unlikely to be questioned due to the fact that you met in a setting that doesn't generally raise that question (it is more for relationships that start on websites or arranged by others and is not an easy issue to raise for IRCC).

So to summarize, I'll 100% agree with Canuck78 above that:
"The most well prepared people seem to be the most worried"

You did well, don't worry so much you have all you need, just make sure you wait until you meet the time and there should be no issue (or none that you could prevent anyways if you get an overzealous officer).
 

armoured

VIP Member
Feb 1, 2015
15,472
7,876
As to the question of whether the relationship was entered into to gain some immigration status, it is very unlikely to be questioned due to the fact that you met in a setting that doesn't generally raise that question
Since I raised that point, to clarify - I don't think this is a particular question either here, I'd just missed the comment about current status in the original post.

(I think there are some other scenarios where it might conceivably be an issue - like an applicant who's already out of status or has received removal orders, etc - but doesn't apply here so 'never mind')
 

Canada2020eh

Champion Member
Aug 2, 2019
2,198
885
Adding my support to your app, looks like you have the situation well in hand. The other members have given you good advice. I think you can relax somewhat, consider the options mentioned and proceed from there. Don't forget to include the daughter in the app!! Good luck.
 
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andrew3081

Hero Member
Apr 6, 2018
286
76
The daughter might be a problem if your partner was legally married in Philippines before.
Did your partner get married before the daughter was born?
 
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Canada2020eh

Champion Member
Aug 2, 2019
2,198
885
The daughter might be a problem if your partner was legally married in Philippines before.
Did your partner get married before the daughter was born?
It wasn't specifically mentioned but the OP didn't say her partner was ever married. I presume the father's name would have been included if they were married. If never married then not a problem but even if had been married the fact that he abandoned them and hasn't been seen or heard from for 11 years isn't a major obstacle. They are considering of applying for common law at this time.
 

andrew3081

Hero Member
Apr 6, 2018
286
76
It wasn't specifically mentioned but the OP didn't say her partner was ever married. I presume the father's name would have been included if they were married. If never married then not a problem but even if had been married the fact that he abandoned them and hasn't been seen or heard from for 11 years isn't a major obstacle. They are considering of applying for common law at this time.
We got a PFL for my wife’s non accompanying daughter. My wife was not married to the father of the daughter and the on the birth certificate for the daughter, there is no name under father’s name
 

Canada2020eh

Champion Member
Aug 2, 2019
2,198
885
We got a PFL for my wife’s non accompanying daughter. My wife was not married to the father of the daughter and the on the birth certificate for the daughter, there is no name under father’s name
I didn't say it was an easy process just that it isn't a major obstacle. A sworn affidavit of the facts might do it. How did you handle it, did it work for you? Can you tell us your experience so that the OP might be able to benefit from it to avoid getting a PFL during their process? The whole idea of this forum is to share what we have been through to help others avoid/overcome the obstacles that they might face in their application.
 
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andrew3081

Hero Member
Apr 6, 2018
286
76
I didn't say it was an easy process just that it isn't a major obstacle. A sworn affidavit of the facts might do it. How did you handle it, did it work for you? Can you tell us your experience so that the OP might be able to benefit from it to avoid getting a PFL during their process? The whole idea of this forum is to share what we have been through to help others avoid/overcome the obstacles that they might face in their application.
Each case is different but in my case, they just want more documents regarding the daughter for the PFL.
They asked for hospital records and baptismal certificate.
My wife’s daughter already completed her medical so that was not an issue.