In order to describe what I saw in Brampton to you, I would have to introduce you to the concept of
Yuga in Hindu Mythology.
Now, I am what you call a non-religious person. But once I stayed in Brampton, I am convinced that Brampton is Kali Yuga personified.
Just to describe Kali Yuga to you:
Before I left my country for a
"brief" period, I didn't really understand exactly what Indian culture was. Compared to the west, there is an extra level of friendliness involved in day-to-day dealings with people.
Have some guest show up at your door? Invite them into your home for tea. Someone shows up at your door in the evening? Offer them dinner. You have a medical emergency? The whole of the neighborhood will come together to help you in your time of need. Going to a city where your extended family lives? You will probably be invited to stay with them instead of staying in a hotel. If you say no, they might even be offended. Stuck in an unknown place? Ask someone for directions and they will take you to that place instead of just telling you the directions.
You get the point. In my culture, there is an obligation to go above and beyond to help someone out. There is a sense of community wherever you go. I am not well-traveled but I am willing to say that this is more of an East vs West thing. I have heard similar things in neighboring countries as well. That's not to say there is no deceit involved. Someone might try to cheat you by displaying the same level of friendliness. But it is unusual if not the norm.
In Canada (or rather the west) life is about
individualism. If you tell someone about your troubles, a person is more likely to just express concern for your problem by saying something like "Oh no! That's terrible! I hope you find a solution to your problem!" There is no obligation to go above and beyond to help someone out. And at the exact same time, people will come across to you as extremely friendly. Even when people say no, they make sure that there will be no hostility between you and them. People say a lot of rhetorical things to one another upon greeting one another, which seemed rather superficial to me.
Here is what troubled me about Brampton. The Indians, over there, in order to assimilate into the "Canadian" culture lose or forget that friendliness expected when dealing with people. But at the same time, they don't let go of the bad aspects of Indian culture. For ex. being nosy, being extremely cheap and selfish, cutting corners, taking shortcuts in dubious ways etc. No one really learns how to be courteous like Canadians and all they are left with are just the bad aspects of our culture. That makes them terrible people deal with it. In fact, I would go so far as to describe them as not Indians, but as a whole new breed of people between Canadians and Indians.
Here is what I saw in Brampton:
1. The Indians over there don't talk to one another. The need to mingle, even with your neighbors which is pretty common in India, is all gone. Everyone just minds their business, which sounds like a good thing but seems strange for someone like me. When you see someone speaking your tongue, you expect some Indianness out of them, which unfortunately is missing.
2. I rented a room through a friend of a friend. Upon reaching there I realized that I was overcharged by 200%. They justified it by saying that no one really lets out a place for just a month and since you make a decent enough amount of money in India, you shouldn't worry about it. The owner of the house, upon learning how much money I made in India, tried to fleece more money out of me. I need a work desk to work during the day. It was placed in another room - his solution? Pay him a few dollars more to use that desk. We came to an agreement where I would pay a little more so that I could use some of his groceries like salts, spices, milk for tea, etc. At the end of my stay, he wanted me to pay him extra for milk again. I barely used a liter of milk, but he needed to pay that extra 6$ for the tea. I had to fight him not to charge me extra. This man owned two houses in Brampton (which go over $1 million each) and owned two really nice cars, but even then he needed extra money for tea. Other stuff included asking me to turn off the lights in my room when using the bathroom.
3. My relatives, who I was on really good terms back in my city, refused to invite me over to their place. At first, they said it is because of Corona, so you should maybe quarantine (and this was in July this year) for a few days before you come to see us. They reluctantly eventually invited me before I was leave for other cities, but treated me like a complete outsider. No warmth or friendliness at all. They also told me stuff like "My son never looks at the price of anything! He just buys whatever he likes!" to imply that I was cheap. Only after they learned that I will be traveling throughout Canada in the peak of summer (read: top dollar for flights and hotels) did they calm down and treated me more normally.
4. In order to travel between satellite cities of Toronto on weekends (because no public transport on weekends between them, go figure), I used a ride-sharing app. The Indian drivers would always ask for more money than agreed upon after I sat in their cars. Without fail. One even tried to charge me 100$ (the agreed-upon price was 20$) because other people on the ride didn't show up so now I should make up for it, otherwise he can't afford to go.
Now before you say "Duh! East is east and west is west. Of course, there are cultural differences." As an Indian, it feels very strange to go through these experiences with your own people. It feels like you woke up one day, and everyone around is just slightly more evil now. You ask yourself why to put yourself through a place like this. Why not deal with westerners, where everyone at least seems friendly on the surface, even if it's superficial.
The Indians outside of Brampton were cool. Every time I sat in a cab with an Indian driver, they would tell me their stories about how they, too, got cheated somehow by another Indian in the beginning. Everyone advised me to stay away from Brampton, at least for the initial period. They told me to only move there once I am more settled down and understand that place and its quirks.
Edit:
I did find some traces of Indian hospitality, which I forgot to mention above:
1. When I went to the bank to open the bank account, I found out that the money I
transferred beforehand to an account was blocked for some reason. The branch that I visited couldn't remove the hold even after trying everything. The (Indian) lady who opened the bank account for me, kept in touch with me for three days after that incident, calling me every day and asking me if I was able to resolve my issue and how I was doing. She even offered me all kinds of good advice about various things on starting life from scratch over here. At first, I thought it was a marketing gimmick, but it turned she was just extra nice.
2. I was catching a bus between two cities from Brampton. Upon reaching my bus terminal, I mentioned my destination to my cab driver, he told me I selected the wrong bus terminal. The actual bus terminal was 4km away. He canceled his upcoming ride and took me to the right bus stop without charging me more.
Any help would be great here.
