PR newbie looking for PR veteran opinion

[etienbjel]

Hi,

I'm currently working on a draft application for my wife's permanent resident visa. The more I fill in the sections, the less confident I feel in how genuine our marriage may look to others. I thought maybe if I told my story, some honest and blunt folk might give their opinion:

Me:
Canadian citizen, Catholic (non-practicing), Male, 32 yrs old, employed, no criminal record, never married, no kids

Her:
Thai, Buddhist (practicing) 32 yrs old, self employed, no crim record, never married, 1 child, didnt finish college, has been self employed for the last 10 years selling dresses in shops.

Our story:
We met on ww.pof.com. I was searching for girls in Toronto. Her friend in Missisauga set up her POF account for her. And so, she used a local postal code on her profile. Hence that's how I found her. We met online June 2013 and maintained daily conversations (as of today - 1850 pages of whatsapp conversation and counting).
We met in person in September on a 2 week vacation. Went to Koh Phi Phi together and went sightseeing in Bangkok. I met her father and he helped me buy a cheap custom made suit (which ended up not fitting me lol). Returned to Canada in October and back to work.
In November she told me she was in debt, about $20,000. How, you ask? She decided to open more shops in 2013. However, soon after, she was soon struck with an illness and was hospitalised for a few months (I was aware of this during our online conversations). This left her with 3 leases to pay, her car payments and a huge hospital bill. The bills were adding up faster than she could keep up. Anyways, I decided to send her about $1000 to help pay for her daughters school. I also sent her $2000 to put 3 months deposit down for an apartment in Bangkok that we planned to live in together.
In December I went on a leave of absence from work and I arrived in Thailand. I did a 6week TEFL course. We lived together between December and April. In January I decided to build a restaurant at the front of her house in her hometown. It was finished in February and the family now run it (her, her mother and her cousins). I send her money to help with the restaurant and also herself.
In February, I sponsored her to come to Canada with me on a TRV to meet my family. However, she was refused due to having no family ties in Canada and not having enough money. I proposed to her in March.
Married in April in a Thai traditional wedding. All of her family attended. My family did not have enough notice to come to the wedding in time. But they all approve of the marriage, even though they have not met her yet.
I returned to Canada in May and now I am working on the application.
My family is sad that I married her before they could meet her. However, they understand that we initially tried to get the TRV so that they could meet, but she was refused. And, that the only way that my family could now meet her is if they flew to Thailand. All members of my family would write a letter saying they approve of the marriage.

I'm not trying to convince anyone so I tried to make this as factual as possible. I'm just looking for an honest first impression and possibly some tips for starting the application process.

Thanks for reading

Ryan

 

[etienbjel]

I should mention that the illness would not prevent her from getting a PR. It was a urinal tract infection, due to poor eating habits.

 

[MofC2014]

You asked for honesty.

As I do not know her I cannot judge her, or your relationship with her.

However, based on facts I can tell you that her saying she is in debt for $20,000 (if you mean dollars) than I can only say its impossible. 20K dollars in Thailand is a huge amount of money. If you were to live there quite frugally it would take you 2-3 years to spend it, therefore I doubt she could have racked that type of debt in a few months.

Ultimately, I do not think you will have major problems in sponsoring her for a PR, it seems you visited plenty times to satisfy CIC, you married traditionally. Your family not attending the wedding is somewhat of a red flag, but not something that can't be explained (it happens a lot btw).

Questions you have to ask yourself is if you believe she is in this relationship for you or for other gains, financial or otherwise.

 

[etienbjel]

Thank you. That actually makes me feel a little better

I only mentioned the debt because I read that if you can show that you financially support your spouse, it will help our case.

I'm not gonna lie. She wants to come to Canada to work and pay down her debt. But the relationship is legit. There's more to the story but I don't want to turn this forum into a soap opera. lol

Thanks for the input!

 

[MofC2014]

Thank you. That actually makes me feel a little better

I only mentioned the debt because I read that if you can show that you financially support your spouse, it will help our case.

I'm not gonna lie. She wants to come to Canada to work and pay down her debt. But the relationship is legit. There's more to the story but I don't want to turn this forum into a soap opera. lol

Thanks for the input!

One thing to remember if she has an interview never ever have her say that she wants to come to canada because of work opportunities which would allow her to pay off some debt. A statement such as this will automatically make the visa officer question her real intentions.

 

[Alurra71]

Well, if you want honest answers, I'll tell you my first impression, but not knowing either of you personally, I can't say for sure if it's the 'truth'.

First blush impression: She has a friend create a profile for her giving a Canadian address so she can meet Canadian men. Tells me she is looking for a way to immigrate to Canada no matter what, that is the main objective. The story you present about hospital bills and other debts, I am sorry to say to you, those are the same things that a Filipino girl told my previous roommate. He sent her 1/2 his paychecks for YEARS and even went to visit her a couple times. It turned out, she had a lot of 'other' US friends that took care of her as well. She too is trying to find a way to a better life, only in the US, not Canada.

I don't want you to get taken, but with all that you are doing, it sounds as if the relationship is genuine on your half, but I would have questions about her intentions. If it 'appears' this way to me with the information you have provided it may also appear this way to a VO.

I wish you luck and happiness and I truly hope it all works out for the best for you.

 

[canuck_in_uk]

Well, if you want honest answers, I'll tell you my first impression, but not knowing either of you personally, I can't say for sure if it's the 'truth'.

First blush impression: She has a friend create a profile for her giving a Canadian address so she can meet Canadian men. Tells me she is looking for a way to immigrate to Canada no matter what, that is the main objective. The story you present about hospital bills and other debts, I am sorry to say to you, those are the same things that a Filipino girl told my previous roommate. He sent her 1/2 his paychecks for YEARS and even went to visit her a couple times. It turned out, she had a lot of 'other' US friends that took care of her as well. She too is trying to find a way to a better life, only in the US, not Canada.

I don't want you to get taken, but with all that you are doing, it sounds as if the relationship is genuine on your half, but I would have questions about her intentions. If it 'appears' this way to me with the information you have provided it may also appear this way to a VO.

I wish you luck and happiness and I truly hope it all works out for the best for you.

I agree with this. The online profile was set up specifically to meet a Canadian man. The "months of hospitalization" from a urinary tract infection is not plausible; most UTIs are easily treated out of hospital with antibiotics. Even a complicated case where the infection spreads to the kidneys wouldn't require such a long hospitalization, a few days to a few weeks at most and that is for a very serious infection.

 

[mikeymyke]

Devil's advocate:

-online dating profile, used Canadian postal code so that she can find potential partners in Canada, shows intention on finding a Canadian partner
-hospitalized for urinary tract infection for 3 months, is a very treatable condition, does not require long term hospital stay, possibly saying this to get sympathy and money from you
-has $20,000 in debt, which is very suspicious in a country where the average yearly income is $10,000, she might be saying this again, to get sympathy and money from you

Now I don't know if she asked you to send money, or you did it voluntarily, but IMO, it's always a huge red flag (red flag to yourself, not to CIC) if someone asks for money. Also I don't know if her family family pressured you to build the restaurant for them or you did it out of the goodness of your heart, but if even her family pressured you just a little bit, it can be a huge red flag.

You should share more of your story with us, maybe there's something we're not seeing and maybe things are not as bad as it seems.

 

[Gumper]

This is similar in some ways to my own situation. Early on in our relationship I took a lot of broadsides from "concerned" friends & family about these crafty Asian (Filipina) women, and definitely found myself on guard, thinking about the old adage "the easiest person in the world to fool is yourself", but one of the clinchers for me was observing my (now) wife's impeccable parenting skills. If she was 'faking' what I consider to be a pretty text book case of super-mom behaviour I would definitely be the biggest sucker in Barnum & Bailey's circus tent. She is also clearly over the moon that her son now has real & loving dad -- whom she would dump once in Canada? I think not. Again, that's just one thing -- never asked me for a dime, is a college grad currently with a good job, great friends & family, etc., but maybe something for you to reflect on (if you haven't already): how would you assess your spouse as a mother? And how is your bonding going with the child? That should be an important & revealing factor in the scheme of things, yes? We are sponsoring TWO people after all -- I assume you're bringing the child? (In our application I also included a description -- and photo accompaniment -- of the evolution of my relationship with "my boy".)

 

[Hasan9999]

I agree with this. The online profile was set up specifically to meet a Canadian man. The "months of hospitalization" from a urinary tract infection is not plausible; most UTIs are easily treated out of hospital with antibiotics. Even a complicated case where the infection spreads to the kidneys wouldn't require such a long hospitalization, a few days to a few weeks at most and that is for a very serious infection.

As long as the relationship is genuine and all supporting papers are there, she might become PR. Your story might influence negatively to the visa officer and you must prove the genuineness. Good Luck!

 

[brucem]

I echo what Canuck was saying. I have never heard of someone getting a UTI through 'poor eating habits' and it is easily treated as its a bacterial infection caused by bacteria entering the urethra or bloodstream. Upper UTI's can be more serious as they can affect the kidneys but this is rare.

I wish you all the best in the application but alarm bells were ringing for me. I know it sounds horrible and tell me to mind my own business but have you researched your spouse or had any suspicions she was talking with anyone else? Remember if you were successful you are financially responsible for her for three years once she gets her PR and enters Canada.

Anyway the path of love never runs smooth but hopefully everything works out for you.

 

[Awesomeg]

As I can see from your post, you have good intentions and the relation appears genuine from your side,
unfortunately, you have mentioned several things that are red flags for any Visa Officer,
First one is that she resourced to misrepresentation when she met you, the use of a false address is not
something that will sound right for any V.O.
Second,
The fact that she is in such debt places her as economic immigrant, and again, any immigration officer
may think that the reason for her to marry were to pay her debt, as you mentioned that she plans to pay her
debt.
The way that you portrait her makes anybody to believe that her intentions are different than yours,
even when they may not be and a genuine relation may be happening, but the fact that you state do not
help your case.
good luck,
Sorry if this is not the kind of reply that you were waiting

Hi,

I'm currently working on a draft application for my wife's permanent resident visa. The more I fill in the sections, the less confident I feel in how genuine our marriage may look to others. I thought maybe if I told my story, some honest and blunt folk might give their opinion:

Me:
Canadian citizen, Catholic (non-practicing), Male, 32 yrs old, employed, no criminal record, never married, no kids

Her:
Thai, Buddhist (practicing) 32 yrs old, self employed, no crim record, never married, 1 child, didnt finish college, has been self employed for the last 10 years selling dresses in shops.

Our story:
We met on ww.pof.com. I was searching for girls in Toronto. Her friend in Missisauga set up her POF account for her. And so, she used a local postal code on her profile. Hence that's how I found her. We met online June 2013 and maintained daily conversations (as of today - 1850 pages of whatsapp conversation and counting).
We met in person in September on a 2 week vacation. Went to Koh Phi Phi together and went sightseeing in Bangkok. I met her father and he helped me buy a cheap custom made suit (which ended up not fitting me lol). Returned to Canada in October and back to work.
In November she told me she was in debt, about $20,000. How, you ask? She decided to open more shops in 2013. However, soon after, she was soon struck with an illness and was hospitalised for a few months (I was aware of this during our online conversations). This left her with 3 leases to pay, her car payments and a huge hospital bill. The bills were adding up faster than she could keep up. Anyways, I decided to send her about $1000 to help pay for her daughters school. I also sent her $2000 to put 3 months deposit down for an apartment in Bangkok that we planned to live in together.
In December I went on a leave of absence from work and I arrived in Thailand. I did a 6week TEFL course. We lived together between December and April. In January I decided to build a restaurant at the front of her house in her hometown. It was finished in February and the family now run it (her, her mother and her cousins). I send her money to help with the restaurant and also herself.
In February, I sponsored her to come to Canada with me on a TRV to meet my family. However, she was refused due to having no family ties in Canada and not having enough money. I proposed to her in March.
Married in April in a Thai traditional wedding. All of her family attended. My family did not have enough notice to come to the wedding in time. But they all approve of the marriage, even though they have not met her yet.
I returned to Canada in May and now I am working on the application.
My family is sad that I married her before they could meet her. However, they understand that we initially tried to get the TRV so that they could meet, but she was refused. And, that the only way that my family could now meet her is if they flew to Thailand. All members of my family would write a letter saying they approve of the marriage.

I'm not trying to convince anyone so I tried to make this as factual as possible. I'm just looking for an honest first impression and possibly some tips for starting the application process.

Thanks for reading

Ryan

 

[katester]

Before I start, please remember you wanted honesty and I am not trying to hurt your feelings.

I understand that health care in America is very different than where she is. But i was hospitalized off and on for three months a few years back. I had a bowel obstruction and before entering the hospital contracted a blood infection. I was hospitalized for 9 days and sent home on bed rest and a pik in my arm for at home IV treatment. I was on bed rest for a month then ended up back in the hospital for 7 more days. Due to over a month of at home IV antibiotics I ended up with a UTI. It was bad and painful. But with the correct and well known medications it cleared up in less than a week. For someone to be hospitalized for three months solely for a UTI is really just not possible. My blood infect had started to take over my organs functions and I was only hospitalized for 9 days. My UTI struck after my body had been through so much and I was so weak. I was only hospitalized for 7 days and it would have been a shorter amount of time if I didn't have an allergic reaction to an IV color dye. So for her to be hospitalized for three months has to 100% be a lie or at least a very large exaggeration.

Secondly with my three months of hospitalization and home care I did not even owe $10,000. Yes, I had insurance but had I not, it would have been over 100k. As others have said the amount of debt she claims is just too specific and too unbelievable.

You seems like a very sweet and caring person and for that I am sorry to say that I think you have been tricked. If you were going to build a restaurant for her family, of course her family going to welcome you to the family with open arms. She intentionally set out to attract a canadian man to free her from her current life. If you do apply, you need to 100% honest on the application and tell all of this. If you lie or omit a portion the Officer will know and you will be denied for misrepresentation or even for fraud. Please don't think we are trying to upset you. Love can be blind and you obviously love her and want to trust her. But you need to see all the red flags that we and the Officer will see.