Scared

[tuyen]

Based on his short post, it sounds like the wife is not interested and just wants him out. (maybe she has another man or woman)

Actually, based on HIS post, it's HE who wants to walk away from his wife, and her only crime seems to be wanting to start a family.

And also, why are you so willing to take everything he says at face value?

There are two sides to every story, and we're only hearing his side - not his wife's side. He's the one claiming how "controlling" she is - and we're supposed to believe that NONE of those traits were present in her personality BEFORE they got married?

I'm sure if she were here, the story would be very different from what he's telling you.

I immediately got a very bad vibe when he started saying that he now has a job and friends in Canada, so it would be okay to leave her now. Sounds like a classic case of immigration fraud.

 

[waiting110]

the reason behind his thread was to ask people if he is going to lose his PR or not. But now since he wont, he's relaxed. Sorry to say.

 

[lunas]

the reason behind his thread was to ask people if he is going to lose his PR or not. But now since he wont, he's relaxed. Sorry to say.

so true

 

[Shiny88]

Actually, based on HIS post, it's HE who wants to walk away from his wife, and her only crime seems to be wanting to start a family.

And also, why are you so willing to take everything he says at face value?

There are two sides to every story, and we're only hearing his side - not his wife's side. He's the one claiming how "controlling" she is - and we're supposed to believe that NONE of those traits were present in her personality BEFORE they got married?

I'm sure if she were here, the story would be very different from what he's telling you.

I immediately got a very bad vibe when he started saying that he now has a job and friends in Canada, so it would be okay to leave her now. Sounds like a classic case of immigration fraud.

Finally somebody with intelligence its his excuses only to leave his wife am telling you,definetely immigration fraud. who knows if it has been 20 months or 20hours.

 

[R151NG5UN]

For the OP.

Life is hard and marriage is just as hard, you have to work at it for it to succeed. I take your initial post at face value but immigrating is not easy on you granted but also think of it from your wife's point of view, she was supportive of you, she sponsored you to bring you to what I assume is a "better life". No marriage is a bed of roses, what you put in you generally get out of it. You should try and work it out because from your 1st post it seems your wife wants to start a family, well that is not really a shocker, somebody who committed to you in a big way when sponsoring you wants for you to start a family.

Perhaps she is frustrated you won't start a family or maybe she is insecure that you "used" her as a golden ticket. I dont know the case in either scenario but I do know settling in a new place is hard work and requires immense effort. Only if you try everything to work things out and become what your parents became (I doubt highly they never argued or had their hardships, you just choose to ignore them) will you become truly happy. Life and marriage is about give and take, the more you put in the more you get out.

Good luck

 

[saint4peace]

The Scared: I have a little question to you. If you have a job, what are you scared of having child with your wife? Her 'short temper'? Anything else? Please indicate a little. Then we won't find any 'problem' with you. I personally think your wife is NOT happy with you for some other reasons and you gotta dig them out, buddy. Good luck with your famly life.

 

[blueboom]

Hi please somebody advise me i arrived in Canada 20 months ago my wife sponsored me the thing is she has changed since there shes not the woman i fell in love with i have been doing everything to make it work nd make her happy but shes so controling nd demanding i talked to her so many times but shes never changed shes really giving me so much stress now . i left everything behind and came in a country that i knew no1 besieds her nd started a new life from 0 so i could be with her i think me not being rich is bothering her shes asking for kids nd buying a house nd the thing is i can`t afford to have none of them for now im a hardworking family guy but nothing seems to make her happy now that i started my life in here have job nd new friends i wanna divorce her because i can`t take this anymore fighting every day it is killing me but i dont wanna lose my permanent resident im a tax payer nd never did anything wrng in my life is there a way i could lose my pr . sppecial thanks to all of you

If we told you your PR could be taken away, would you stay with your wife? ??? If nothing is making your wife happy now that you have a job and friends here (meaning she's no longer the center of your world?), then your PR status is the least of your concerns. No one here is going to know the details of your marriage or your wife's point of view, but if I were in a situation where it was bad enough to want to leave my spouse, I'd leave whether or not the PR could be taken away. Good luck.

 

[saint4peace]

COMMENT: The people like "The Scared", are the problem of this day's immigration issues! We all should try our best to sort out our real partners in life. We also do a lot of emotional mistakes. Please think about it, what I am trying to say.

 

[waiting110]

COMMENT: The people like "The Scared", are the problem of this day's immigration issues! We all should try our best to sort out our real partners in life. We also do a lot of emotional mistakes. Please think about it, what I am trying to say.

agree 100%. There are genuine relations out there trying to settle in Canada through spousal sponsorship but its for fraud cases like this one we have to go through a long wait.

 

[Shiny88]

I also agree with the 2comments below. ''The scared'' i wish your wife report you and something can be done about it if you end up leaving her and she finds out the truth of the reason you married her(maybe she already regrets marrying u and knows you usedher)

 

[aerogurl87]

Well she can't take away his PR, but with that said if he gave up everything just to be with her, why doesn't he go back home? I know if my boyfriend and I broke up, I'd go back home because that is where my biggest support network is. I always have to question when people come on here and say they're relationship went south, but intend to stay in Canada when everyone and everything they love is back in their home country. But maybe I'm a cynic.

 

[tuyen]

Well she can't take away his PR, but with that said if he gave up everything just to be with her, why doesn't he go back home? I know if my boyfriend and I broke up, I'd go back home because that is where my biggest support network is. I always have to question when people come on here and say they're relationship went south, but intend to stay in Canada when everyone and everything they love is back in their home country. But maybe I'm a cynic.

No...you're not saying those things because you're a cynic. You're saying it because you're not scammer/fraud artist. Your mind operates as that of someone who came here for the sole purpose of being with her husband. Should that reason no longer apply, the logical thing to do would be to return to where you have all your family - especially if the time you spent in your new country was brief.

If he was saying he didn't want to go home because he's been here for 20 years and his whole life is now here, then fine, I would buy that. But that's obviously not the case here, and he wouldn't go back home unless he was forcibly removed, despite the fact that once he gets a divorce, his whole life will be BACK HOME.

 

[saint4peace]

The Scared: You please think twice about leaving your wife. Even if you get married again, how would you assure youself that you will get a 'rosy' life ahead with the new 'prey'? Please think it again and again before you leap.

 

[Halfmoon]

How many scared threads are there?

I'm sure your kind hearted wife put alot on the line to sponsor you as there are both financial and emotional risks involved. Put that aside for a second. I am sure her dreams of which she SURELY discussed with you of one day having a family and home were both your goals while on the phone all those nights apart. I am almost certain that a reasonable person who would consider dating and thus getting married and then sponsoring is not thinking about how you would join her in Canada and ditch her for your "new" friends. Sure it's healthy to have a group of friends but your first priority is your wife and the commitments you made to her on your wedding day!

Asking for children and planning around building a home is the natural progression of a marriage. If you don't believe me, start another thread called "What comes next after marriage?". You on the other hand have hit a candy store when you landed, thrown out every moral value that may have existed within the narcissistic mind of yours and can't think beyond the empty shell you call a brain.

I'm a pretty good judgement of character and what I smell here is "by the way everyone, I'm Scared..please listen to my sob story. I'm a good man, devoted husband, blah blah blah...........now wait here it comes.........BY THE WAY, my wife complains too much BUT WHAT I'd really like to know is, can I leave my wife without loosing my PR!

Wow, didn't see that one coming. You're like a FOR SALE sign that no one is buying.

 

[saint4peace]

The Scared: People like 'you' makes our lives harder to bring our spouses. I did not want to be hard on you. But I can't help myself saying you a 'scammer'. Please forgive me. I really don't like a man like you, being myself a man. I just see that you are so selfish. Jumped into 'divorce' within 20 months! So sad a man, you are! Feel Shame for you being a man. Every man MUST know how to handle his wife delicately, and softly. It is delicate kinda relation, and at the same time heck of a responsibility. Please grow up man.