Husband Threatning to revoke PR by False Accusations

[saniya]

Hello Everyone
Me and my husband got married in Jan 2009 then he came to Canada in May 2009 and applied for my PR.I was studying at that time in India.My visa came in February 2010 as i was studying so i just came to Canada for just 15 days and went back.My husband was really very nice to me at that time use to send me so many gifts we use to talk whole day on phone was really very happy with him.Then after completing my study i finally joined him in Canada in July 2010 got a nice job in august.when i started the job 2-3 days later he started abusing me and hitting me ...and dint allowed me some share from my first salary to my parents in India..then it started frequently like he will hit me whenever he would be frustrated or anything ...they didn't even allowed me to talk 2 my parents in India...whenever i called someone was there to hear what i am talking was really scared so use to communicate all the things to my sister through email....i was not even strong enough to get out of home alone as i don't have any one out there.....i tried adjusting with him for whole 1 year may be that he may realize his mistake one day and stop all this....
then my brother and sister in-law got the PR for Canada they came over here for 2 days and then in July 2011 my bro n sis in law came here for 2 weeks...to live with us....then on the last day when they were about to leave my husband slapped me for no reason...my brother heard it and had an argument with my husband then my brother tried talking to my in laws about whatever is happening but they were not ready to realise there sons mistake my brother took me away and asked me since when its all going i told him that its since a long time....then he asked me that you wont be living here and took me away....i came out of house with 2- clothes....and lived in a basement ..no one called me for 4 days.....and as soon as i transferred all my salaries that were left in the joint account to a new personal account they started calling me and asking me to come home....
in short they were concerned about money not me.....i just want to get separated from that person as soon as possible what i am concerned about right now is

1. I did not filled a police complaint for domestic violence against him...and its been 1 month that i am living on my own?can i file domestic violence now..if yes then how can i prove it that he did that to me...although i have some emails in which he confessed that he did abuse me and hit me will that act as a proof?


2.He use to tell me when we were together about his various friends who got there daughter-in-laws deported on false accusation of marriage of convenience(moc)?is this possible for him to put false accusation on me of MOC and deport me....as i know him that if i file a divorce this is the only allegation he can put on me.?

3.also i need to bring my certificates and other valuables from there home ...how can i get back those things.....

 

[Leon]

Go to the police, tell them about the violence and ask them to accompany you to their house to pick up your documents. If you are worried about going to the police alone, go to a womens centre and seek help from them.

He can accuse you of misrepresentation but he can not prove it and you already lived with him and had a joint bank account with him for over a year so nobody will believe him that it was marriage fraud.

 

[Baloo]

100% agree with Leon's suggestion.

Be strong, you do not have to put up with this.

 

[Mhut]

Hi Saniya,

I hope you are ok, am so sorry to hear about what has happened with you. I cannot give you any advice about the law there but wish you best of luck and may God keep you safe and under his guidance at all times.

Take care
Mhut

 

[saniya]

thank you everyone for your replies but when i will approach the police then how would i prove that he abused me and hit me can i prove it through the e-mail in which he confessed that he hit me and abused me or i do not need any proof.

 

[Leon]

You should not need any proof but bring the emails anyway.

 

[saniya]

hey actuaally i am really scared 2 go to police as i dont know anyone in canada....will it be right to seek help of police...i am really very upset as i want this to work....and one more thing
he is telling me that he can write it in written that he wont hit me or abuse me...should i believe him and give this relation one more chance or just move on

 

[Leon]

You are right to seek the help of the police to avoid a confrontation with him when you pick up your stuff and also to ensure that you actually get your stuff.

Do you really believe that he will stop abusing you and hitting you if he writes it down on a piece of paper? Do not go back to him. He will surely start abusing you again. Maybe not right away but soon.

Like I said before, if you are afraid to go to the police, look for a womens centre where you live to get support and maybe someone to come with you.

 

[saniya]

also...can he accuse me of running with his money or jewellary....can i prove to police that i come here with just two clothings as my sister in law was with me when i came from there place so can she be a witness that i didnt took there money or any jewellary with me???

 

[Leon]

He can accuse you of anything he wants but he can not prove it if it isn't true. It is his word against yours. Besides, you have a job and you don't need to steal from him.

 

[Mhut]

Saniya,

I agree with Leon, do not trust him, the saying a leopard never changes its spots is so true.

He may become worse then what he was before because you left in the first place, close this chapter and start fresh, be strong.

Mhut

 

[newtone]

Don't take up any employment, take him to court, since he is earning money and he signed on the immigration form that he is financially responsible for you for 3 years, he'll have to bear all costs. So just relax put your life in cruise control for 3 years and do some site seeing. Get a doctors note saying you are mentally stressed out, present it to court get your husband to pay for your trip and other expenses. Either he'll come running behind you like a dog or you'll enjoy your trip across Canada, in both cases its a win win situation for you.

 

[Leon]

newtone, she is already working and has a good job. She would be stupid to throw that away just to take vengence on her husband by trying to make him pay.

Besides, his sponsorship agreement doesn't cover paying for cruises and her living the good life and sightseeing. It just covers that if she has to go on welfare, he has to pay back. Yeah, she could go on welfare, that's about $500 a month or so. She can't live on that so she would be making herself poor just to hurt him.

She may get something out of the divorce though, half the assets, whatever depending on if there were pre-nups and if he actually owns anything on the papers or if it is just his family that owns everything. If they need her pay-check, it doesn't sound like they have a lot of money.

 

[saniya]

yes leon you are right there financial status is not so sound ...and i don't even want any kind of favor from them i can live on my own...its just i want to live a peaceful life and cant loose my dignity and self respect....tell me will talking to them about out of court settlement is a good idea or not as if i talk to them about out of court settlement they might think that i am scared of them and cant file a legal case as i am alone....so they might go to the police and have a false complaint against me that i did MOC or fraud etc.....one more thing to file a police complaint do i need to go to the police station near my in-laws home or i can file a complaint near where i am living right now?

 

[Baloo]

You would be better off going to a womens centre and seeking help from them.
Don't make decisions without some kind of help, legal or otherwise.