online relationship ohio/alberta, ca...future concerns...help?

[canada_love]

hello CV forums

i am currently living in the US (Ohio), i am in an online relationship with someone in Alberta, Canada (8+ months). i guess i am looking for some guidance as to what to save, keep track of and compile of things i would need if the relationship continues forward to marriage and being together in Canada (if we were in the same location we would be in a serious committed relationship 100% already). its been a short time and neither of us want to rush into things but if the time comes when its an option for us i would rather be prepared than scrouging for documents. our only means of communication at this time are msn messenger, voice chat on the computer, text messaging, email, facebook, and web cam. we have plans to meet but unfortunately at this time due to finances ( $1000+ for tickets, passport, etc ) and us both attending school/trade/apprenticeship programs it is not possible. (chat logs are really my only record of us, ive sent a few gifts and have receipts...but i feel like im scrounging for documents to save for the future...)

i have looked at the skilled worker program to see if i qualify but i don't. i am trying to finish school and possibly look for a job in the health care field in Canada but seeing as i am not able to travel back and forth it seems like it could complicate things. maybe once i continue schooling and have more medical experience i would be apt to find a job there?

any other suggestions as to other options so we can be together??

i have a 3 year old son also....what laws does my son fall under? would he need to be adopted?? (sorry had trouble finding info on children)

on a side note my credit report is with faults...possibly may need to file bankruptcy will this affect things??

any helpful info would be great. this is all scary and exciting. i don't want to get ahead of the game but like i said id like to be prepared since we both have sincere feelings for one another but the distance/inability to move there is keeping us from each other.

i am open to answer most questions.

thanks, k

 

[ambar]

I'm sorry I don't have information pertaining to your son or the bankruptcy issue but I'm sure someone else on here will.
In terms of the online r/s, I think emails, and possibly printscreening your inbox to show that you save his emails (if you do) and
maybe ask him to do the same as well. Emails are good to print out, like select few to show the dates on them which will help you out in the future to show how long you have been in a relationship. You can also save your chats and print out a page or two and attach those well. I'm sure once you both are free from school or your other priorities and you do meet, you will have tons of things to send in like pictures of you two together. If you have any cards, or letters you have mailed to one another that is also good to save as well, plus phone bills are good to have too, especially if you save all of this ahead of time.

Gluck and all the best to you both

 

[freckles4256]

hi there to help you with the one line thing. well me and my husband meet on facebook and we chat on msn with video calling
what we did is we took photos of each other chatting on msn and i have put them in my paper work expaining that this is
how we see each other. I all so said we use facebook and i printed out emails that we had sent to each other. We have been with each other for 2years on line and got married this year in feb. If you have visted your partner then you can put in the airline tickets and photos
of you both together on hoilday together. This is what i did as well as i have been to see my husband 2x for a hoilday and just
took heeps of photos.
I havent sent my paper work yet so cant tell you if that has worked but i hope this is some kind of help.
from freckles

 

[AllisonVSC]

I think at some point before you apply for PR/ get married etc, you will want to prove some quality face to face time. Recognizing that travel to each other can be expensive as soon as possible get your passports. Then look for options to meet at a mutual location maybe its camping somewhere near the border. maybe you can save so one of you can attend the other's family special events (wedding, Christmas, Canada day, what ever). Be sure to save itineraries and take lots of photos. Send more cards (birthday, special thinking of you, anniversary of first meeting, etc) and letters (reporting significant events regarding school progress or family, your feelings for the other, and plans for the future)....send them the old fashioned way and date them. If your families have meet your gf/bf encourage them to connect this way too.

I don't recall having to submit any records of credit history in the application (I;m US; he's Canadian), but if are in default and have had court decisions you should mention them somewhere in your background declaration; I'm just can't remember where. Also, if you come to Canada before you receive your PR the IO will want you to have enough money to live on while you are here, since you will not be able to work.

One other thought, you mentioned both are in school, but you won't qualify under skilled worker. You may want to consider applying for a year of extra schooling in Canada and get a student visa. If you can stay one year with your partner, you can establish a common law relationship as far as IO is concerned and apply through that class. Short of that a summer school program could get you some face to face time.

Hope this gives you some ideas. It is great that you are thinking so far ahead!

 

[canada_love]

we have never sent cards before, i have sent him a birthday present but have no record other than the receipt from the post office, but i will take your advice and send more cards (i should photocopy before i send them i assume??)

we are trying very hard to work out the details of meeting and you are right, im sure we will get lots of pictures and documents verifying we met so thats a relief. hopefully we will get the chance to meet more as times goes on. i love the idea of meeting at a halfway point also ty

@ambar ty for the info! yes i keep everything (gah glad i am sentimental!) with the exception of text messages (if needed could get a full print out from the cell phone company though) i will def be print-screening everything as time goes by and keep it prepared....great idea! you mentioned he should do the same? hehe not sure that he is as sentimental as i am but i will have him email me screenshots of what he has ;D

@freckles4256 - ty, i didnt think to take screenshots of us voicechatting/web camming - huge suggestion that i really appreciate!! hope things go well for you when you send in your paperwork. would love to keep in touch to hear how things work out.

@AllisonVSC - ty for all your ideas/suggestions....have you applied and gotten your PR? have you landed? where did you marry (CA or US)?

ty for the other suggestions gives me a glimmer of hope

- still looking for answers on the poor credit (or possibly if i file bankrupcy)

and

-how things work with having a child (can he attend school if i was to ever get PR? does the person im in a relationship have to adopt him and sponser him also? or can i not bring him with me if i got PR at some point? or would he be considered family after a marriage and thus we would both get PR?

 

[Siouxie]

With regards to your son, he will be listed as your dependant on the sponsorship and application for permanant residency and processed at the same time as you are.

However, please be aware that unless the child's father has given written consent for you to remove him from the country or you can get a court order severing his parental rights and giving you consent to remove your child from the country, you will not be successful in your application.

If you were thinking of NOT bringing him with you, you would have to resign all your parental rights permanantly and could never bring him or sponsor him to come to Canada. CIC would question this, IMHO, he is your dependant and unless you severed all ties with him legally you must put him down on the application forms. That is a very drastic step and not one I would recommend.

If you can get a letter or court order and the sponsorship is approved and it all goes through, after processing your PR (permanant residency) application and presuming PR is granted, you and your son will have the same rights and freedoms as anyone else in Canada and can attend school, work etc. The only thing you won't be able to do is vote.

 

[canada_love]

With regards to your son, he will be listed as your dependant on the sponsorship and application for permanant residency and processed at the same time as you are.

However, please be aware that unless the child's father has given written consent for you to remove him from the country or you can get a court order severing his parental rights and giving you consent to remove your child from the country, you will not be successful in your application.

If you can get a letter or court order and the sponsorship is approved and it all goes through, after processing your PR (permanant residency) application and presuming PR is granted, you and your son will have the same rights and freedoms as anyone else in Canada and can attend school, work etc. The only thing you won't be able to do is vote.

@ Siouxie ty for the info on schooling and filing for dependants, very helpful....i have never been married, i am no longer with my sons biological father. the father isnt even listed on my sons birth certificate....could you clarify more on if i would still need written consent?

 

[Siouxie]

Hi, sorry I was just editing my last post

Does your son's father have visitation rights? Does he pay any child support? Is he listed anywhere that he is the father?

If the answer is "yes" to any of the above, you will need a consent order from a court or a letter stating that he gives his consent.

If the answer is "no" to all of the above I think CIC will still question you - however, I will do a little research and get back to you

 

[canada_love]

@ Siouxie yes ty saw you edited...i have re-read your response. my son is only 3yrs old so for future ref he would in fact come with. child support is being processed at this time (i receive gov assistance while going to school otherwise i wouldn't have pursued child support....i would rather cut all ties)....i will keep it in the back of my mind that i would need a written consent for the future unless you find any other info saying otherwise

really appreciate the help, just want to be prepared ahead of time just in case

 

[canadianwoman]

When you send letters, cards, and gifts, keep the envelope because it shows the date. In your application you send a photocopy of the card or letter AND the postmarked envelope. Keep your phone bills - if you use calling cards, stop, and get a phone account that shows the number you are calling, even if it is more expensive. Save all emails - send in a printout of the inbox, and a selection of the emails themselves spanning the length of your relationship.

 

[Siouxie]

@ Siouxie yes ty saw you edited...i have re-read your response. my son is only 3yrs old so for future ref he would in fact come with. child support is being processed at this time (i receive gov assistance while going to school otherwise i wouldn't have pursued child support....i would rather cut all ties)....i will keep it in the back of my mind that i would need a written consent for the future unless you find any other info saying otherwise

really appreciate the help, just want to be prepared ahead of time just in case

If your son's father has contact and/or pays child support you will definitely need his consent to remove your son from the US and emigrate. If he refuses, your only other option is to apply to the court to give consent to remove him.

Sorry it isn't better news

 

[canada_love]

@ canadianwoman ty i will inform him to keep such things that i send him like envelopes and letters. we do not talk on the phone since we voice chat for free but i can get records showing how long we have been texting. appreciate the info!

@ Siouxie im thankful for the info, at least its news even if its not good news lol. i pray i will not have issues obtaining a written consent letter should the need arise.

 

[freckles4256]

hey there im glad i could be of some help. I dont have kids so cant help you with that but start sending emails and saving them as this will help and anything that proves your relationship is real. Yes getting married is the easy way but i fully beleave that you marry when
you are both ready and no its the right time. Just be as honest as you both can.
I will keep in contact with you to see how your doing.

from freckles

 

[AllisonVSC]

we have never sent cards before, i have sent him a birthday present but have no record other than the receipt from the post office, but i will take your advice and send more cards (i should photocopy before i send them i assume??)

we are trying very hard to work out the details of meeting and you are right, im sure we will get lots of pictures and documents verifying we met so thats a relief. hopefully we will get the chance to meet more as times goes on. i love the idea of meeting at a halfway point also ty

@ ambar ty for the info! yes i keep everything (gah glad i am sentimental!) with the exception of text messages (if needed could get a full print out from the cell phone company though) i will def be print-screening everything as time goes by and keep it prepared....great idea! you mentioned he should do the same? hehe not sure that he is as sentimental as i am but i will have him email me screenshots of what he has ;D

@ freckles4256 - ty, i didnt think to take screenshots of us voicechatting/web camming - huge suggestion that i really appreciate!! hope things go well for you when you send in your paperwork. would love to keep in touch to hear how things work out.

@ AllisonVSC - ty for all your ideas/suggestions....have you applied and gotten your PR? have you landed? where did you marry (CA or US)?

ty for the other suggestions gives me a glimmer of hope

- still looking for answers on the poor credit (or possibly if i file bankrupcy)

and

-how things work with having a child (can he attend school if i was to ever get PR? does the person im in a relationship have to adopt him and sponser him also? or can i not bring him with me if i got PR at some point? or would he be considered family after a marriage and thus we would both get PR?

I applied as a conjugal partner in August 09 and received my PR just less than 3 months later. My partner and I are not married and did not meet the common law requirements. I landed in November and imported my belongings upon return to Canada after Christmas vacation. Hope you are getting the answers you were looking for regarding your finances and your son. Sorry I can not help you with those.

 

[canada_love]

@ freckles4256 ya neither of us are quite ready for marriage so just preparing things and documents as our relationship progresses, again ty for your input and suggestions hope things go well for you.

@AllisonVSC oh thats wonderful! so glad you are with your partner. ty for all of your answers

i will continue to search for information on my son and credit history questions. possibly make a new post. thanks again for all the support and help and GL to everyone