+1(514) 937-9445 or Toll-free (Canada & US) +1 (888) 947-9445

i am applying in a weak ! pls review my sop

Discussion in 'Education' started by manpreet7777, Jul 7, 2019.

  1. Statement of Purpose

    I am Manpreet Singh pleased to write this statement of purpose in regards to my application for studying Associated degree in Science in College of New Caledonia in September 2019 intake. I belong to Village Faridkot which falls under District Bathinda. Iwas born and brought up here in nuclear family. Recently, I have completed my one-year Advance Diploma in Computer Applications in July 2018 with 68.25% marks. I did my 12th from Punjab School Education Board. I chosePhysics, Chemistry and Mathematics as my major subjects and got 64.44% marks overall. I completed my 10th grade education from Central Board of Secondary Education and scored 8.0 CGPA.

    We are currently in the midst of technological and computing revolution that will drastically change our lives and potentially redefine what it means to be a human. I am very excited at the prospect of devoting my career to such a dynamic and fast advancing field.

    After my 12th education, I decided to choose Computing stream to make my career and for further studies. I pursued Advanced Diploma in Computer Applications to delve into caves of computing and to get familiar with it. After successfully completing my Diploma, I decided to pursue my higher study in Canada and attempted IELTS exam. I took IELTS exam in October 2018 and scored 6.0 bands overall.

    I want to study in Canada because of many reasons. Firstly, Canada is well-known for itsquality education in the world where a number of students come to study from different countries. Canada’s education system focuses on practical and theoretical both aspects. Itfocuses on academic excellence so that the students can get a good job in the same field.Secondly, Canada’s colleges and universities provides Diplomas, Advanced Diplomas, Degrees and Post Degree Diplomas at very affordable prices. Likewise, I found Canada suitable location for me.

    College of New Caledonia is one of the reputed colleges located in British Columbia. It offers a variety of programs for international students in different stream such as Business, Science, Trade and Technology and so on. It offers a variety of basic facilities to students such as Library, Parking, cafeteria, Bookstore, Counseling, Academic Advising, Accessibility Services and so on. The College focuses on quality of study to be delivered to students so that the graduates can find a good job in the relevant field.

    About Associate degree in Science, this program includes Applied science, Maths and English that creates a scientific foundation in learners so that they choose their area of specialization such as Biology, Chemistry, Physics, Engineering and Computing Science. Moreover, this program enables the students to get the credits transferred to the University level at in the Degree.

    I would choose Computing Science as my career path. Computing Science is an emerging option nowadays because technology has made a drastic change in the lives of people. Technology has made the lives easy through inventions and launch of new devices and new ideas of working. In modern era, the Computing technology is used and required everywhere and in every small to large business firms for communication with customers and manpower, to store the data, to explore the data and many more functions.

    Computing Science is very wide field that covers the whole Computing functions such as programming, networking, administration transferring the data, security and many more. As IT industry is booming industry where large-scale of job opportunities are offered to students in my home country as well as in other developing nations. In present scenario, Computer is an unavoidable part of all organizations and sectors of the economy, and hence, the employment opportunities for computer science professionals are high. This program will appeal to students who are problem solvers with good analytical skills. This course is perfect for the person having strong interest in computers.

    I am committed about learning advanced skills in Computer system that will obviously help me to enhance my career prospects. After successful completion of this program, I would be able to work on different positions such asSoftware Application Developer, Web Developer,Computer System Analyst, Data Administratoror Network System Administrator. Aftersuccessful completion of this program, I wouldbe able to give a kick start to my career in computing and IT industry.

    My aim in life is to establish myself at some good place so that I can grow with excellence in my work. This course will improve my performance and career aspects in life. I will become a skilled person who is ready to compete, succeed and lead in today’s competitive world. I do understand the value of my course and I literally want to add value to my higher qualification.

    At the end, I would like to summarize the letterby saying that I am a bonafide aspirant with aclear ambition to carry my career into Computing and IT field and to grow in the same field. I am submitting my application with high hopes. I would like to request respected High Commission to consider my profile and give me a chance to fulfil my dreams.



    Thanks & Regards

    Manpreet Singh
     
  2. #2 russ6970, Jul 7, 2019 at 11:41 AM
    Last edited: Jul 7, 2019
    I assume this is your SOP. It's too big and has got grammatical errors. You don't need to say 'nuclear family' for instance. This looks like you are padding it with words that don't necessarily need to be there. All in my opinion of course.
     
    Msbrar likes this.
  3. #3 Copingwithlife, Jul 7, 2019 at 12:30 PM
    Last edited: Jul 7, 2019
    Run it thru a grammar and spelling check, as mentioned, too many unnecessary words. More does not always mean better. Keep it short and concise
    Note; I could not find in your SOP that you were planning on using the education earned in Canada back in your home country. They want to see that you will leave at the end of your education.
     
    Msbrar likes this.

Share This Page