Canadian sponsoring American wife - want to do this right

[flowingforward]

Hello, I'm very thankful to have found this helpful forum.

My husband and I met online on a forum over 2 1/2 years ago. We talked every night on Skype, and fell in love. We met in person a little over 2 years ago, and he visited me almost every week since then. Things worked out very well - we got married (civil ceremony) early July. We do have quite an age difference - I'm 23 and he is 47. (Age is just a number to us - we are madly in love.) He works 3 jobs - a very hard worker but he does it for us.

Let me back track a bit - not long after we met I wanted to go on a vacation in Canada and stay at his place - but I was very naive (as was he) about the whole border-crossing process. I accidentally had so many red flags: we had the car packed full of my stuff, we tried to cross at a weird time (3am), I told them he was my best friend who I met online - and while that was true at the time it came across as very suspicious. To top it off I didn't have my own place at the time. And my ties to America were not excellent, since I did not speak of my family - but actually my family is cut out of my life because I was abused by them physically, sexually, and mentally and they are extremely dangerous to be around. (I escaped from their abuse in January 2014 - which is one reason I did not have my own place yet when I was at the border crossing) For obvious reasons, I was denied access into Canada. I was given what looked like a form letter, with points highlighted on what I needed to do differently the next time I tried to cross.

Anyway! Lots of things have changed since that bad time. I've been too terrified to attempt crossing since that one time, so my husband has been visiting me nearly every week since then. I have my own place that I've been living in for over a year - my husband has been paying the rent. We also have a dog and he's been paying her vet bills. But... to top everything off... I also recently found out I'm pregnant! It was unplanned, happened on our wedding night - we are extremely happy but also quite nervous about how to handle everything.

My landlord said he'd be happy to write a formal letter for me to include in my sponsorship stuff - explaining how my husband has been buying me food every week and paying the rent for over a year. (I do not drive because I'm a terrible driver. I'm currently unemployed. I am not on any government assistance.)
We also have lots of photos from our wedding (we only invited 2 guests), we have wedding rings with the date and each other's names engraved inside, we had a wedding cake with our names on it, and a small after-party with our two guests. My husband even pre-recorded a piano song that was played over the speaker after our wedding. (I have written letters/sent photos to his immediate family members, and have talked with his mom on the phone. I took some photos during our honeymoon, and also have some photos from before we even got married.) His church is also going to put our wedding photo in their next newsletter - which we will get copies of. We also have copies of our marriage certificate, of course.

I legally took my husband's last name - my social security and state ID are both changed now to reflect that, and we are sending my passport in very soon to be changed.
I'm concerned since I do not have any family here that I can list as being a part of my life. However, my husband's family (they live in Ontario and Manitoba) does already love me and I know they would be willing to write letters saying that.

I want to do this sponsorship thing the right way - I don't want to miss a detail and I want to do everything properly. I'm hoping for some advice on things I should include for the proof of relationship, and tips on how I should approach this sponsorship process.

 

[canadianwoman]

It sounds like you have a lot of proof that your relationship is genuine. The fact that your family did not attend the wedding is not ideal, but in the application you can explain that you are not close to your family.

Continue your relationship, gathering evidence of your communication and his trips to visit you. Proof of financial support is very good.

To be sponsored, you need to have a medical, which includes an x-ray. It is not advisable to have an x-ray while pregnant. You can either do the medical now and send in the application, with the note that the x-ray will be done after you give birth. Or you could just wait to send in the application until after the baby is born. Some doctors will do the chest x-ray while you are pregnant, but most doctors don't think it is a good idea. If you do decide to get it while pregnant, it is best to wait as long as possible, for the baby's health.

 

[flowingforward]

It sounds like you have a lot of proof that your relationship is genuine. The fact that your family did not attend the wedding is not ideal, but in the application you can explain that you are not close to your family.

Thank you very much for the response!

I appreciate the advice, I will do that. What do we do about the fact that my husband's family also didn't attend the ceremony? The two guests were actually my landlord and his girlfriend. (They do consider me their family) My husband's mother (his father is deceased) wasn't able to attend because she is elderly and unable to travel - lives all the way in Manitoba. His brother's family wasn't able to attend either, also due to long traveling distance.

Continue your relationship, gathering evidence of your communication and his trips to visit you. Proof of financial support is very good.

To be sponsored, you need to have a medical, which includes an x-ray. It is not advisable to have an x-ray while pregnant. You can either do the medical now and send in the application, with the note that the x-ray will be done after you give birth. Or you could just wait to send in the application until after the baby is born. Some doctors will do the chest x-ray while you are pregnant, but most doctors don't think it is a good idea. If you do decide to get it while pregnant, it is best to wait as long as possible, for the baby's health.

Very good to know, thank you. I would prefer to do the medical now with the note about the x-ray taking place after birth. Does not having the x-ray now due to pregnancy have a negative effect on the whole application? As in, will they see it as an issue or are they generally okay with it?

Again thank you so much for your reply, it has already been very helpful.

 

[canadianwoman]

For any family members who wanted to come, but could not because of illness or lack of funds, you can just explain this in the application. You could also get them to write you a letter explaining that they approve of the relationship and believe it to be genuine, but could not come to the wedding because of ....

Delaying the x-ray because you are pregnant is not an issue. The visa officer will not view it negatively. It will delay the application simply because they won't start processing it until the x-ray is done.

 

[flowingforward]

For any family members who wanted to come, but could not because of illness or lack of funds, you can just explain this in the application. You could also get them to write you a letter explaining that they approve of the relationship and believe it to be genuine, but could not come to the wedding because of ....

That all makes sense - thank you.

Delaying the x-ray because you are pregnant is not an issue. The visa officer will not view it negatively. It will delay the application simply because they won't start processing it until the x-ray is done.

Okay, that's good to know. But bummer...so a delay in the sponsorship application being processed. I'm guessing this means it won't even begin to get processed until after the baby is born? (Whenever it is medically okay to get the x-ray)

 

[flowingforward]

Since it appears the sponsorship application will be delayed (unless I misunderstood) until I can get that x-ray - I'm wondering if I can at least visit my husband.

I've been terrified of attempting to try crossing again, since I don't want to get denied access again. I assume that would be pretty bad. I so wish to spend time with him there, to get involved with his church, to even maybe [travel the long distance and] visit some of his family. I want to be with him and have experiences there.

I don't even know if I have enough ties to America(due to me not being close to my family for the reasons mentioned in my OP), and since my husband is providing for me financially I'm guessing the border guards would find this unacceptable since it isn't my own income.

I wonder if it would be better for me to visit with someone from here? I have three people who have said they'd be willing to drive me to Canada. (It's a fairly short distance from where I live)

I honestly just want to at least VISIT my husband. I apologize if this post is confusing/sounds a bit
silly and ignorant - I'm still learning about all of this. And as I've mentioned - I just want to do this right.

 

[canadianwoman]

You should be able to visit. Have proof of ties to the USA, and a return ticket (if possible). Even if you go with friends, the border agent will suspect you are going to visit him. Look at that form letter if you still have it, and see what you can do differently this time.

Americans are usually let in to visit once they have started the PR application process. Even paying the fees and getting the receipt could be enough to show you have started the process.

Do you have health insurance in the US? If you do, and that is what you will be using to pay for the baby's delivery, and prenatal care, this is one 'tie' to the USA you could show. After all, if you have the baby in Canada, you will have to pay for the delivery yourself.

 

[flowingforward]

Americans are usually let in to visit once they have started the PR application process. Even paying the fees and getting the receipt could be enough to show you have started the process.

Sorry for a newbie question - is there kind of a Catch-22 here? I was under the impression that showing evidence that I am involved in his life in Canada was important. It sounds like I can't visit him without sending in the application and it sounds like I can't send in the application without visiting him.

Do you have health insurance in the US? If you do, and that is what you will be using to pay for the baby's delivery, and prenatal care, this is one 'tie' to the USA you could show. After all, if you have the baby in Canada, you will have to pay for the delivery yourself.

I don't think I have health insurance, but I'm unable to find out since contacting my mother (whose insurance I was on) is not an option.

I'm finding out health insurance options for me.

 

[canadianwoman]

Sorry for a newbie question - is there kind of a Catch-22 here? I was under the impression that showing evidence that I am involved in his life in Canada was important. It sounds like I can't visit him without sending in the application and it sounds like I can't send in the application without visiting him.

Because they didn't let you in once, it is more risky for you to try to enter Canada than the average American. However, people in your situation have managed to do so.
Basically, the border agent wants proof that you will leave Canada. So he or she is looking for ties to your home country. A return ticket with a specific date is a good idea if you are flying. Proof of a job, home ownership or a lease, bank accounts, investments, anything that shows ties to the USA will help. They often do not ask to see any of this, but it is good to have it just in case they do.
However, if an American applicant has already applied for PR as a sponsored spouse or partner, they are almost always let in. Ties to the USA are still good to have with you. Proof of the application is some evidence that you are planning to do this the right way - if you have applied to be sponsored, you presumably will not hurt your chances by overstaying or doing something illegal.
Remember when talking to the border agent that you are just visiting Canada.
No one can say for sure what will happen when you show up at the border, but many people on this forum have been let in with no problems after applying for PR. Even some who were previously refused entry.

 

[CDNPR2014]

Sorry for a newbie question - is there kind of a Catch-22 here? I was under the impression that showing evidence that I am involved in his life in Canada was important. It sounds like I can't visit him without sending in the application and it sounds like I can't send in the application without visiting him.

as someone who was red flagged for 1.5 years before becoming pr, i can relate. while it is scary to cross the border in this situation, you can certainly go and visit and you probably will be pulled into secondary and have to explain yourself every time. don't let that scare you into assuming you can't visit; that is CBSA doing their job.
it's important to remember your situation is much different than the last time you tried to cross the border, so your experience at the border now is also going to be different. back then, it sounds like you didn't understand the rules. you are now married and understand what you need to to do move to canada. knowing you can only "visit" until you receive pr and showing proof of intentions to apply (or proof of a submitted application) shows them you are trying to follow the rules. i was denied entry, then once i returned and was able to prove what they want they were happier with me. when i got married and showed proof of applying for pr, they were even happier. when you know what you are suppose to do and do it right, they are at their happiest. they are certianly friendlier when you are married than just dating.

 

[flowingforward]

Thank you both - it sounds like from your posts that it is best for me to have proof of starting the PR application process before I make my first visit. It's really good to know that, and I hope the border agents will see I'm doing this right.

 

[CDNPR2014]

Thank you both - it sounds like from your posts that it is best for me to have proof of starting the PR application process before I make my first visit.

yes, and have proof you paid at least the sponsor's fee (that's the cheapest). If they ever ask to see proof, having the receipt shows actual intentions. it's fine to pay the fee at anytime before the app is submitted. i think i paid the sponsor fee 6 months before submitting so I can use it as proof for crossings.

 

[flowingforward]

Hello everyone, I'm back with a couple more questions.

They're about my first visit to Canada.

Is it okay for my husband to come along with me on the bus trip?

Currently my husband is employed and I'm not. When I cross the border, whatever money I have in my wallet will be from him. Will that arrangement be acceptable to the border guards?

 

[profiler]

Hello everyone, I'm back with a couple more questions.

They're about my first visit to Canada.

Is it okay for my husband to come along with me on the bus trip?

Currently my husband is employed and I'm not. When I cross the border, whatever money I have in my wallet will be from him. Will that arrangement be acceptable to the border guards?

You're married. Make them aware of that. Whatever money is his, is yours too. Also make sure they know that he will be supporting you while you are here.

I am not saying you won't be pulled into Secondary for a chat, but if he is crossing with you, he will be immediately available to answer any of their concerns.

 

[flowingforward]

Sorry for late response - thank you. That all makes sense.