Baby Boom...!

[cartonkay]

I appreciate your comments guys.....

to (hopefulagain) and whoever thinks alike;

1. I think you are being too quick to judge by saying I do not care because I do not have to bare the consequence...you might wanna withdraw that comment because I do care for both the mother and especially the unborn.

2. she wanted the baby more because we both agreed NOT TO MAKE CHILDREN B4. but she suddenly change her mind....of course I want to respect her decision because it is her body after all....we are both getting along well and already talking to councilors for advice.

3. I am only more concerned that I did not intend to stay after school, but for the sake of my unborn, I have to reconsider my decision.

4. I did not put this post here for anyone to take similar trail, it is more of an awareness creation and warning to other international students for what our actions could lead to.

 

[Sweetalker]

hahaha so keep us updated on what happens afterthe birth since then we can hope to use a similar strategy if u get the cnadian citizenship quiker

Haha..!!!

 

[Sweetalker]

Lol ru sure thats yr baby, go for DNA first, make sure... I mean after ur one night stand she may have one night sleep with someone else ???

This is a possibility.. Give it some thought..
I know it is easy for us to say than for you to think and work out.. But still.. nothing wrong in making sure..

U be the judge here.. It also depends on this kind of terms you have with her..
But this is a huge deal, coz she decided to keep it.. so you ARE in this too even if she says shez gonna take care of it herself..

So you gotta set things straight..
What does she want from you in this.. any sort of support ? Financial ? Emotional ? nethng man..

Is she saying you do not have to do anything for her and the baby?
If yes that best to document that I would say.. she can change her mind in the future..

If she wants any sort of involvement from you, for now or future.. it would be in your best interest to get a DNA test.. trust me on that..!!
You shud make sure this is your baby.. before you do or say anything u wud regret later..

Im saying all this.. coz no matter wat you and she decides.. the baby's biological father will always be YOU...!!!!
(that is.. if it IS your baby in the first place)

Watever you do bro.. always keep your A*S covered...
All the best..

 

[Sweetalker]

I appreciate your comments guys.....

to (hopefulagain) and whoever thinks alike;

1. I think you are being too quick to judge by saying I do not care because I do not have to bare the consequence...you might wanna withdraw that comment because I do care for both the mother and especially the unborn.

2. she wanted the baby more because we both agreed NOT TO MAKE CHILDREN B4. but she suddenly change her mind....of course I want to respect her decision because it is her body after all....we are both getting along well and already talking to councilors for advice.

3. I am only more concerned that I did not intend to stay after school, but for the sake of my unborn, I have to reconsider my decision.

4. I did not put this post here for anyone to take similar trail, it is more of an awareness creation and warning to other international students for what our actions could lead to.

You did nothing wrong here bud..
Its a FORUM.. so the primary implication is and always be - random view from others..

So its all fine..
I do not, neither do I have the right to.. question your decency..

It is your life.. and only yours to live.. so live it the way you want to..
We can just share our views with you.. nothin much.. nothin more..

I admire your courage to be open about such things with random people on a forum..
I tried to share my view.. I hope you find the best way out..

all the best..

 

[cartonkay]

thanks sweetalker......I appreciate your comments.

I wish you all the best too and stay out of trouble.

 

[Sweetalker]

Netime frend..

This happened to a fren of mine.. and it got ugly.. really ugly I mean..
Just wanted to let you know..

I appreciate your supportive take on this..
But SHE changed her mind later, which was not the deal when you went in.. she could do it again.. and many time further in the future..
U need to ask yourself if you are prepared to deal with that for the time ahead as well ?

Being vigilant seems foolish when all is well.. but no one knows for how long it stays that way.. So it is best to keep things straight..
Surprises arent pretty when they arent on your good side.. so better to be sure before you commit..

I personally take it as a breach of trust when a partner goes in for a one night stand, and later decides to change terms, without thinking of implications on the other partner.. That is not very empathetic..
I hope you catch my drift here..

My apologies if I am too detailed on this.. My intention was not to impose.. but to suggest and warn..
I am a little emotional on this topic as I have seen many, as in many lives of people I know turn sour, in turmoil, pain, and agony because of wrong decisions made with the females in their lives..
Dats it..

Peace..

 

[Abdul Hannan]

You and Abdul hannan are absolutely disgusting. You find this situation funny? The OP has done a STUPID thing and he doesnt have to bear the consequences so he doesnt care. What about the child? He/she will grow up and find out that they were born because the mom and dad could not keep things zipped up - not because they wanted a child. His/her birth was a mistake. Thats really going to make a child feel nice and loved :

And you both not only find it funny but also think this is a good way to get your PRs. That mindset speaks volumes about the values your parents must have instilled in you. You and your kind are a scum of any civilized society.

BTW, i am a male and Indian (asian) and ashamed to be both after reading your despicable comments. And b4 you msg me back remember that one day you could be fathers of daughters (after marriage) . I dare you to find the same situation funny then.

I took it in this way coz he jimself asks that how would it hurt his status as a international student and yes they both are idiots ofcourse who did this stupid 1 night stand. i would suggest thy shud get married now

 

[Leon]

Is she saying you do not have to do anything for her and the baby?
If yes that best to document that I would say.. she can change her mind in the future..

As far as I know, the mother can not legally give up the right to child support because that is the right of the child. She could agree to it and even sign papers but if she later changes her mind, he could be asked to pay child support owed since the birth of the child. He will not be asked to pay any support to the mother because they were not in a relationship.

Of course he should get a DNA test done before signing any paperwork. It is better to make sure now rather than finding out later.

 

[Leon]

I took it in this way coz he jimself asks that how would it hurt his status as a international student and yes they both are idiots ofcourse who did this stupid 1 night stand. i would suggest thy shud get married now

One night stands are common in Canada and so is sex outside of marriage. In Canada, having sex doesn't mean you must get married. Even having a child doesn't mean you must get married. In Canada you only get married if you want to and if the marriage doesn't work out, you simply get divorced.

Getting married to a woman he had a one night stand with is not necessarily a good idea. He doesn't even know her so how can he know if they are compatible? Even if he would want to, that doesn't mean that the woman wants to marry him. Apart from that he doesn't even know for sure if he is the father yet. Marrying the lady and then finding out that the father was her ex boyfriend she just broke up with, now that would be really stupid.

 

[tyson450]

I hope that the girl’s parents and family take the news well. To some it will be the most unwelcome shock and earth shattering, to others it will be joyous news.

Some men seemingly have no problem fathering many kids, with differing partners and are oblivious to their needs and upbringing. Others are denied access to the child when they want contact and are eaten alive mentally, I mean yeah you are still a ‘single man’, having a good life but somewhere in the world your child is growing up with a different dad or no dad at all.

I wish all parties the best in this situation.

 

[Hopefulagain]

I appreciate your comments guys.....

to (hopefulagain) and whoever thinks alike;

1. I think you are being too quick to judge by saying I do not care because I do not have to bare the consequence...you might wanna withdraw that comment because I do care for both the mother and especially the unborn.

2. she wanted the baby more because we both agreed NOT TO MAKE CHILDREN B4. but she suddenly change her mind....of course I want to respect her decision because it is her body after all....we are both getting along well and already talking to councilors for advice.

3. I am only more concerned that I did not intend to stay after school, but for the sake of my unborn, I have to reconsider my decision.

4. I did not put this post here for anyone to take similar trail, it is more of an awareness creation and warning to other international students for what our actions could lead to.

@ Cartonkay......Quick to judge????? Let me clear something for you....

1) My post was primarily meant for Abdul Hannan and singh_king. They think that this is an excellent way of gaining PR and that I think is despicable.

2) Stop convincing yourself that you care about the child. Your 1st post mentioned that you had given the lady option of aborting the child but, she refused. Now I am definitely pro-choice but your option is a definite sign that you consider the child an inconvenience, so stop fooling yourself. Your actions speak louder than your words.

3) You indicated in your post that you heaved a sigh of relief when you learnt that you did not have to take care of the child - because you were not ready psychologically and financially - and then you claim that you care about the child? HAH!

4) You have indicated that you will take care of the child once you have a job or whatever. You do know that once a child is born, he/she has to eat, wear clothes, use diapers etc etc etc. The child cannot put his/her needs to a full stop because YOU do not have a job.

5) Do you want to put a wager with me that by the time you get your job, you will not be anywhere near this lady. Forget about taking
care of the child. But dont worry, we will be taking care of your child - through welfare.

You really want to prove that you care for the child. GO GET A PART TIME JOB and support the child. Stop making excuses. You are not the victim in this.

Like I said, stop fooling us that you want to do the right thing but cannot. You should have thought that before you unzipped yourself. YOU BOTH ARE EQUALLY RESPONSIBLE for this.

If you both are old enough to F**k, then you both are old enough to take responsibility......right from the word go and not when you think you are ready.

 

[Hopefulagain]

Netime frend..

This happened to a fren of mine.. and it got ugly.. really ugly I mean..
Just wanted to let you know..

I appreciate your supportive take on this..
But SHE changed her mind later, which was not the deal when you went in.. she could do it again.. and many time further in the future..
U need to ask yourself if you are prepared to deal with that for the time ahead as well ?

Being vigilant seems foolish when all is well.. but no one knows for how long it stays that way.. So it is best to keep things straight..
Surprises arent pretty when they arent on your good side.. so better to be sure before you commit..

I personally take it as a breach of trust when a partner goes in for a one night stand, and later decides to change terms, without thinking of implications on the other partner.. That is not very empathetic..
I hope you catch my drift here..

My apologies if I am too detailed on this.. My intention was not to impose.. but to suggest and warn..
I am a little emotional on this topic as I have seen many, as in many lives of people I know turn sour, in turmoil, pain, and agony because of wrong decisions made with the females in their lives..
Dats it..

Peace..

@ Sweettalker.....How typical of you? Its the girls fault, right? She is the one who "spoilt" the your friend's life. I guess your friend just didnt have any "hand" in this?

Do you know how children are made? The guys have an equal part in this. Just because they dont get pregnant does not mean its not their responsibility when their "fun time" results in a child.

If your friend and others you know were so worried about their lives and future, thats what they should have concentrated on. You reek of typical male chauvinistic behaviour which ALWAYS blames the girl.

Breach of trust?.....You REALLY are a specimen. Both - the guy and the girl - go into this 1 night stand without giving any thought to the consequences. Now just because it does not suit your friend, he wants to abort the child. You talk of empathy. What about empathy from your friend towards the woman - and respecting her choice? So your friend wants to have fun but when it results in unwanted consequences he wants no part of it and you consider it a breach of trust?

As I have said it b4 - if your friend is old enough to f**k, then he is old enough to take responsibility. If he did not think he was ready for the responsibility, then he should have kept it zipped up. Your friend (or any other guy) is NOT the victim.

Implications on other partner?????????????? HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA the implications on a guy's life is NOTHING when compared to a woman's. Did your friend think about that? Oh! wait, we are men, so we dont have to think about anything or anybody else. As long as we are not inconvenienced.

 

[elokuu]

A man can always protect himself from surprises like this from happening by simply wearing a condom. If the man neglects to do that, tough luck - he has to bear the consequences then. There is no need to blame women for getting pregnant if you choose not to protect yourself from conceiving unwanted children.

 

[cartonkay]

*Leon....comments well appreciated.

1. Hanan is indeed confused and does not know where to belong....you are apparently a cheap hood-rat who will gamble with life.

2. Hopefulagain....I did not give her an option to abort, I do not see that from my lines....you can quote me if you want.....I pointed that out because that is what she said; "I think I am pregnant and I am keeping it" its not even proven scientifically that she is pregnant, why would I ask her to abort....a feeble mind like yours might make that quick suggestion, not me.

3.Hopefulagain...I cannot get a part time job because I do not have a work permit yet stupid...this clearly tells you are being quick to mention cuz you do not even know the details.

3. Hopefulagain...I did not ask her for a baby, but if she wants to pull a scam on a man by dubiously claiming she pregnant with the hope that this will get her a man, then you are both wrong.

4. Hopefulagain....I do not need your cheap and porous welfare to take care of my child, at least she working and makes enough for that...besides its not your business how much I pay for child welfare in the future, as long as I pay in the name of my "assumed child" it doesn't bother me.

5. hopefulagain....why are you even fuming over this when evidence has not even been established with regards to the child's paternity ? do not be a bucket mouth buddy......shut your sh*t hole and smell its rot if you have nothing reasonable to say.

 

[Hopefulagain]

*Leon....comments well appreciated.

1. Hanan is indeed confused and does not know where to belong....you are apparently a cheap hood-rat who will gamble with life.

2. Hopefulagain....I did not give her an option to abort, I do not see that from my lines....you can quote me if you want.....I pointed that out because that is what she said; "I think I am pregnant and I am keeping it" its not even proven scientifically that she is pregnant, why would I ask her to abort....a feeble mind like yours might make that quick suggestion, not me.

3.Hopefulagain...I cannot get a part time job because I do not have a work permit yet stupid...this clearly tells you are being quick to mention cuz you do not even know the details.

3. Hopefulagain...I did not ask her for a baby, but if she wants to pull a scam on a man by dubiously claiming she pregnant with the hope that this will get her a man, then you are both wrong.

4. Hopefulagain....I do not need your cheap and porous welfare to take care of my child, at least she working and makes enough for that...besides its not your business how much I pay for child welfare in the future, as long as I pay in the name of my "assumed child" it doesn't bother me.

5. hopefulagain....why are you even fuming over this when evidence has not even been established with regards to the child's paternity ? do not be a bucket mouth buddy......shut your sh*t hole and smell its rot if you have nothing reasonable to say.

You can curse me as much as you want but the fact remains that YOU are the dead-beat dad. If you were not sure that this was your baby then you would have framed the question differently - asking advice about how to figure out if the child is yours or not - not asking advice about how it will affect your status. So you are somewhat convinced that this is your child. You are only looking in this forum to find out ways you can get away with this indiscretion without any consequences on your study visa - thats what your original post was about.

Like I said - stop making excuses and stop trying to exonerate yourself.

And my opinion of you still remains the same ---- you were aware that you did not have the ability to take on additional responsibility but you still were callous enough to unzip and take a chance.

If you dont need my welfare, then GET A JOB. You both are the parents, you have as much responsibility as she does. And if you want to act all high and mighty, then act accordingly.

From your desperate response, I can see you are clutching at straws to keep your dignity intact - at least in your eyes. Your 3rd response proves that. You did not ask for a baby? and that its a scam? In short - everyone but you are wrong. Like i said - you are NOT the victim here. Were you not aware that the "act" could result in a baby? You were aware, you just didnt care.

And finally just to show you that you are such a liar. In your previous comment you had said "you might wanna withdraw that comment because I do care for both the mother and especially the unborn." and in this post you call her a scammer. What an excellent way to show how much you care for someone?

Like I said...............DEAD-BEAT