Odd Stuff - when you talk to friends in your old home country

[LH84]

Ahhhh, life seems complicated in Gatineau, I ment Hull, maybe it's Guatineau... never mind!
By the way, is it in Quebec or Canada?

[Baloo]

BTW, I have yet to see a moose. Guess I need to hang out in the lobbies of luxury condos in Ottawa.

Allison

You will see loads in that area !

[mameelynn]

lol at all of these!  The questions I get asked a lot from my in-laws as we get closer to moving (back for me) to Canada are about the health care.  They seem to think that there is only one doctor in the whole country.  Like if I have to take my kids to a pediatrician I will have to join a huge line because there is only one in the whole country!  Which is pretty funny to me because I never have had as many issues getting in to see doctors until I moved to the US!

[asmallant]

This thread is SO much more amusing (in a laugh out loud kinda way where I am compelled to read the responses to my partner) than the "CBSA DRUGGED ME" and the "Can I sponsor my sister as my common law partner?" threads which have kept me reading forum posts the last couple days. I wish I could think of one or two of the stupid questions I've been asked since moving here (from the southern part of the Unites States y'all), but I can not think of one at this time.  Thanks Baloo, Leon and others for making my evening!

BTW, I have yet to see a moose. Guess I need to hang out in the lobbies of luxury condos in Ottawa.

Allison

I do not want to upset anyone, I am sorry for that. I just want to let you know what happened in the world. I am risking my family may be broken forever too, but I am really upset, sad to the bone...

[qorax]

I do not want to upset anyone, I am sorry for that. I just want to let you know what happened in the world. I am risking my family may be broken forever too, but I am really upset, sad to the bone...

Dear "A-Small-Ant",

I went back & read all ur previous posts... u seem to be having some trouble on 4 fronts:
a) Ur Husband's illness;
b) Ur own illness;
c) Ur deportation due to overstay; and
d) Ur PR processing being stagnant.

If that's so - I'd advise u to take professional help asap [reg. ur PR case]... pls try & contact Attorney David Cohen [the owner of this website] - for a candid view of ur processing.

All the best, Ma'am!

Qorax

[asmallant]

Dear "A-Small-Ant",

I went back & read all ur previous posts... u seem to be having some trouble on 4 fronts:
a) Ur Husband's illness;
b) Ur own illness;
c) Ur deportation due to overstay; and
d) Ur PR processing being stagnant.

If that's so - I'd advise u to take professional help asap [reg. ur PR case]... pls try & contact Attorney David Cohen [the owner of this website] - for a candid view of ur processing.

All the best, Ma'am!

Qorax

refer to your words

a) yes, under care of Doctor, many prefessionals , but NO LOVE OF FAMILY AROUND.
b) No doctor said that
c) I DID NOT OVERSTAY.
d) yes.

David cohen did not answer me.

What is your new suggestion please?

[Canooknic]

Remember when we used to laugh and joke on this thread??? 

[qorax]

Remember when we used to laugh and joke on this thread???  

We still could...

Here's few great answers, by just completed 1095 days PRs,
at Canadian Citizenship Test/s

Q. Who are the Aboriginal peoples of Canada?
A. Joe, Marge, Fred, Little Tom, Kinney, and Wilma.

Q. Where did the first European settlers in Canada come from?
A. Um... Europe, I guess?

Q. Why did the early explorers first come to Atlantic Canada?
A. Well, it was pretty bloody hard to go to Pacific Canada, wasn't it?

Q. What three industries helped the early settlers build communities in the Atlantic region?
A. Wal-Mart, McDonald's, and uh... Tim Horton's.

Q. Who were the United Empire Loyalists?
A. I guess, a British football team.

Q. What important trade did the Hudson's Bay Company control?
A. Hockey cards.

Q. What did the government do to make immigration to western Canada much easier?
A. Made living in eastern Canada so unbearable that everyone fled west.

Q. What is the Canadian Constitution?
A. I think, a piece of paper!

Q. Which was the last province to join Canada?
A. Newfoundland... (while this is the truthful answer, the applicant went on to explain) b'coz it was a Newly Found Land!

Q. Name two fundamental freedoms protected by the Canadian Charter of Rights and Freedoms.
A. The right to *censored word* about the government and the right to apologise to anyone for no particular reason.

Q. List three ways in which you can protect the environment.
A. Why? Can't the federal government do it themselves?

Q. What are the two official languages of Canada?
A. English and French (spoken really poorly by both - English & French speakers).

Q. What song is Canada's national anthem?
A. Duh... The theme to Hockey Night In Canada!

Q. Where are the Great Lakes?
A. Probably where you last left them.

Q. Which country borders Canada on the south?
A. Um. China? (sorry, this is to trip Americans applying for citizenship)

Q. What are the three main types of industries in Canada?
A. Beer, hockey, and donuts.

Q. In what industry do most Canadians work?
A. Based on the NHL players, it's definitely ice-related.

Q. What is Canada's system of government called?
A. According to my dad, it's “A F***ing Mess”.

Q. What are the three parts of Parliament?
A. “Goofy”, “Dopey”, and “Sleepy” (Hey Canucks, did anyone knew there were three?)

Q. What do you call a law before it is passed?
A. A joke.

Q. How are members of Parliament chosen?
A. Usually it's the only person left after everyone else says: “I don't wanna do it!”

Q. Who do members of Parliament represent?
A. Themselves.

Q. How many electoral districts are there in Canada?
A. Seriously? Even the CBC doesn't know this and has to look it up.

Q. What three requirements must you meet in order to vote in a federal election?
A. (a) Be alive, (b) not be totally drunk, and (c) be ready to start *censored word*ing about the changes.

Q. What do political parties do?
A. I think this is a survey, b'coz the government must be looking for suggestions on this one.

Qorax

[Canooknic]

Yay! Thanks qorax, we're back on track 

[mycan]

Sir Qorax,

Its superb.

Please accept +1.

mycan

We still could...

Here's few great answers, by just completed 1095 days PRs,
at Canadian Citizenship Test/s

Q. Who are the Aboriginal peoples of Canada?
A. Joe, Marge, Fred, Little Tom, Kinney, and Wilma.

Q. Where did the first European settlers in Canada come from?
A. Um... Europe, I guess?

Q. Why did the early explorers first come to Atlantic Canada?
A. Well, it was pretty bloody hard to go to Pacific Canada, wasn't it?

Q. What three industries helped the early settlers build communities in the Atlantic region?
A. Wal-Mart, McDonald's, and uh... Tim Horton's.

Q. Who were the United Empire Loyalists?
A. I guess, a British football team.

Q. What important trade did the Hudson's Bay Company control?
A. Hockey cards.

Q. What did the government do to make immigration to western Canada much easier?
A. Made living in eastern Canada so unbearable that everyone fled west.

Q. What is the Canadian Constitution?
A. I think, a piece of paper!

Q. Which was the last province to join Canada?
A. Newfoundland... (while this is the truthful answer, the applicant went on to explain) b'coz it was a Newly Found Land!

Q. Name two fundamental freedoms protected by the Canadian Charter of Rights and Freedoms.
A. The right to *censored word* about the government and the right to apologise to anyone for no particular reason.

Q. List three ways in which you can protect the environment.
A. Why? Can't the federal government do it themselves?

Q. What are the two official languages of Canada?
A. English and French (spoken really poorly by both - English & French speakers).

Q. What song is Canada's national anthem?
A. Duh... The theme to Hockey Night In Canada!

Q. Where are the Great Lakes?
A. Probably where you last left them.

Q. Which country borders Canada on the south?
A. Um. China? (sorry, this is to trip Americans applying for citizenship)

Q. What are the three main types of industries in Canada?
A. Beer, hockey, and donuts.

Q. In what industry do most Canadians work?
A. Based on the NHL players, it's definitely ice-related.

Q. What is Canada's system of government called?
A. According to my dad, it's “A F***ing Mess”.

Q. What are the three parts of Parliament?
A. “Goofy”, “Dopey”, and “Sleepy” (Hey Canucks, did anyone knew there were three?)

Q. What do you call a law before it is passed?
A. A joke.

Q. How are members of Parliament chosen?
A. Usually it's the only person left after everyone else says: “I don't wanna do it!”

Q. Who do members of Parliament represent?
A. Themselves.

Q. How many electoral districts are there in Canada?
A. Seriously? Even the CBC doesn't know this and has to look it up.

Q. What three requirements must you meet in order to vote in a federal election?
A. (a) Be alive, (b) not be totally drunk, and (c) be ready to start *censored word*ing about the changes.

Q. What do political parties do?
A. I think this is a survey, b'coz the government must be looking for suggestions on this one.

Qorax