Got married on an impulse, now want out........

[sammyboy]

I married in a foreign country in a impulse in the spring of this year.  I am in love with another woman.  I am a Cdn citizen.  My wife has come to know that I do not love her and that I love someone else.  Due to family pressures I have not been able to dissolve this marriage, but am looking to do it soon.  My wife filled out the application form and sent me a cheque for funds.  I still have it and have not sent it off as I cant bring myself to do so.  The problem is that she just called me last night and informed me that she got a work visa!!!  I didnt even know she had applied for one.

Now she is prepared to come here and my question is:

1.  Am I financially responsible for her in any way (and she has children) if I didnt sign a declaration or agreement that I would be (never sent off family sponsorship application);
2. Can I still dissolve my marriage quickly and on what grounds? (the marriage was never consummated);
3. Will she have recourse against me, legally and financially?
4. Am I tied to her work visa in any way legally or financially?


This is not a case of abandoned bride.  I just realized too late that my feelings were true and unaltered for someone else.  I did not intend for this to happen and feel horrible about it.  I may just end up living with my wife and not pursue a life with my girlfriend, that is how torn I am about this situation.  Please offer good advice and no criticisms, I know what I have done is horrible. 

[Siouxie]

What Province do you live in?  There are different rules for each province.

As for your responsibilities:

1)  If you have not sponsored your wife then you are not responsible for her with regards to immigration financial matters, however, there are different rules within the family law that may require you to support her.

2)  If you have proof that the marriage was not consummated you may be able to apply for an annullment (see here for Ontario http://www.ontariodivorces.com/annulment.html ) but it isn't easy.  Once you live together it will be impossible!

As for divorce, you would have to wait one year.  http://laws.justice.gc.ca/en/D-3.4/index.html  Do a google search for "Family Law" for the province you are in and you will get the link to your provinces legal website.

There are different rules for marriage under Muslim law.

There is a very interesting article (take no notice of the title!) which gives good information about similar situations to yours.  http://www.swc-cfc.gc.ca/cgi-bin/printview.pl?file=/pubs/pubspr/066231252X/200010_066231252X_21_e.html 

 Nobody can force you to sponsor her and her children though - it is your choice.

However, you may be able to get out of sponsoring her by stating to her that you believe the only reason she married you was in order to come to Canada - a so called "Marriage of Convenience" - she may just want to divorce you then

If you don't live with her at all she will have a problem prooving your marriage was genuine. 

http://www.cic.gc.ca/English/department/media/facts/marriage.asp


I think you need to see a lawyer.

[sammyboy]

Thank you Siouxie,

I live in BC.  I have had approx 6 conversations with her over the last 7 months.  The last 4 being about the fact that I made a mistake and that I should not have married her.

Part of me feels that she really just wants to come to Canada, after finding all of this out, but I have no right to question her motives.

She claims she loves me, we spent 14 days together in total after marriage, in the presence (home) of my sister and always had family members around all the time.  I did not sleep in the same bed as her ever, I slept on the couch in the living room and had to create situations where I would not have an opportunity to be left alone with her.

I dont know how I could prove non-consummation other than not knowing about physical features such as birth marks or something like that.

Thank you for your response.  I will look up the sites that you have provided.

[Siouxie]

http://www.lawlink.bc.ca/    I strongly suggest you go to a law clinic!

You have every right to question her motives.  Do not be coerced into doing or signing anything and don't be made to feel guilty.  Do not sponsor your wife until you have got legal advice.  You will be responsible for her for 3 years and the children for 10.  Seeing a lawyer will be a lot less expensive than paying for her and the children in the long run!

Immigration Canada will be very suspicious that the marriage is not genuine if there have only been 6 calls in 7 months! 

Was this marriage arranged by your family or was this someone you already knew?  Had you dated for a while before your marriage?  Does she have a legal right to bring her children out of their country?  Is she divorced and will it be recognised here?  Was the marriage your idea or your family / hers?

http://www.thestar.com/DesiLife/article/456477

You say it was spur of the moment - yet she agreed to move to a new country with her children without hesitation and has already got the work permit!   Sorry, but that would send alarm bells ringing for me. 

If she has already got a work permit, did she inform them that she was going to apply to Canadian Immigration under the family rules?  When did she apply for it?  One of the requirements is that she agrees to leave Canada when her work permit has ended which obviously won't be the case if you sponsor her, unless she filed dual intent. 

Go to the CIC website and read the guidelines for sponsoring a wife and children - and the spouse questionairre she will need to fill in.  Do you think Immigration Canada will believe it is genuine?  If not, she could risk being prosecuted. 

If YOU have doubts about her real intentions then CIC are going to too -  you should really trust your gut instincts.  When in doubt - don't.

Research (google) sham marriages in BC - you will be shocked at how frequent they are. 

Sorry for the abruptness but I just spent 30 minutes writing a long involved message complete with links and the system wiped it out 

Hope all goes well

[Leon]

You are not responsible for her except as a husband to a wife, same as if it was a Canadian wife.  If you want a divorce, she may have claim to some of your assets although doubtful since you never lived together and weren't married very long.  I would try to get an anullment.

You are not reponsible for her regarding immigration because you didn't sponsor her.  Her work visa has nothing to do with you.