big age gap

[harumi1987]

hi everyone, i am new here on this website im a Filipina. I have a Canadian boyfriend, he is 24 years older than me, we met online thru a dating website last December 2010, since the day we meet on that site we never stop talking, everyday we are talking, and that develops our feelings for each other, and hopefully we will meet this year and get married, after we get married he will sponsor me to come and live with him in Canada.. So is the big age gap will be a big issue on applying the visa? pls do answer i want to have ideas about it.. thanks..

[medellinguy]

maybe...but the red flag here will be if you guys marry the first time you meet...but some cases it worked out well with this too..

[harumi1987]

that is the plan, marry on the first meet.. 

[scylla]

Can he visit you at least once before you marry?

I agree that a significant age gap and marrying the first time you meet will be a red flag to immigration. You should start collecting evidence to prove that your relationship is genuine now (e.g. emails, letters, cards, etc.).

[harumi1987]

I think he can do that visit me first before marriage...

And yes i started doing that, i keep the cards that he sent to me, email's, chat logs and some text messages..


will it be hard to prove that the relationship is genuine because we have a big age gap??

[harumi1987]

I just want to have an idea on the process of applying for the visa, what would be the problems, so we have everything good before applying for the visa..

[nice2010]

 


   1. age gap dont matter sometimes lots who got visa with the age gap of 40 years.....  some will undergo interview.........BUT first time to visit you and marry right away you will be in trouble  plus immagine you just met him online last dec.2010 so still early. meet him first know each otehr well and make himvisit for the second time then apply......i know its hard and expensive but its the best......just an opinion

[harumi1987]

   1. age gap dont matter sometimes lots who got visa with the age gap of 40 years.....  some will undergo interview.........BUT first time to visit you and marry right away you will be in trouble  plus immagine you just met him online last dec.2010 so still early. meet him first know each otehr well and make himvisit for the second time then apply......i know its hard and expensive but its the best......just an opinion

He will surely visit me for the second time, yes i understand your opinion, we are really deeply inlove with each other.. As of now we are gathering ideas on how to do that

[Habibti]

My husband lives in Morocco and I am in Canada.  He is 20 years younger than me (some people say I look younger than him lol).  The age gap is a big concern to me regarding our application.  However, I met him 3 years ago on a website for languages and since then we have communicated via msn.  Also we have been sending each other emails or text messages every day.  And sometimes we talk on the phone.  I met him for the first time last summer (in 2010).  And I went back to Morocco in December to marry him.  And I will go back this summer.

You see....  we have known each other for 3 years before marrying and applying for the sponsorship.  I guess our relationship will sound more serious to the visa office because we endured all this time!  I recommend you don't marry right away.  Take some time to know him well and him to know you...  When two people are committed to each other for a long time, the visa office will take them more seriously.

[cleo]

Why wouldn't you meet before marrying?    I've met plenty of people online and believe me, they are not the same as in person.   You are young, make sure he is the right one.   Meet him first.   You've only known him since December, take your time.   This is a big red flag, don't deny it, don't gloss over it.  It's more of a red flag than the age difference.

[harumi1987]

My husband lives in Morocco and I am in Canada.  He is 20 years younger than me (some people say I look younger than him lol).  The age gap is a big concern to me regarding our application.  However, I met him 3 years ago on a website for languages and since then we have communicated via msn.  Also we have been sending each other emails or text messages every day.  And sometimes we talk on the phone.  I met him for the first time last summer (in 2010).  And I went back to Morocco in December to marry him.  And I will go back this summer.

You see....  we have known each other for 3 years before marrying and applying for the sponsorship.  I guess our relationship will sound more serious to the visa office because we endured all this time!  I recommend you don't marry right away.  Take some time to know him well and him to know you...  When two people are committed to each other for a long time, the visa office will take them more seriously.


wow that's nice.. we talk talk on the phone sometimes, thank you for that opinion, and i will have to tell him all of this,,

[harumi1987]

Why wouldn't you meet before marrying?    I've met plenty of people online and believe me, they are not the same as in person.   You are young, make sure he is the right one.   Meet him first.   You've only known him since December, take your time.   This is a big red flag, don't deny it, don't gloss over it.  It's more of a red flag than the age difference.

yes i understand your opinion, but then that is just a plan for now, i will tell him all of the infos that i got here.. You have a point and i think i will do meet him first

[canadianwoman]

Definitely do not marry the first time you meet - people who have done that have been accepted, but with a big age gap as well, it will just make things more difficult for you.

Try to have him visit you as often and for as long as possible. When you do get married, make it look special - it doesn't have to be a big ceremony, but it should look like you two really love each other. Have both families there if possible. Try to develop a relationship with his family, and he should try to develop a relationship with yours. Likewise with friends. When he comes visit you, introduce him to lots of relatives and friends, and get proof of this.

Document everything - keep in contact with each other using methods that leave a record: the record of Skype calls can be printed out, emails should be saved, letters are good - and keep the envelope to prove the date, if you phone each other a lot use a land line so you have bills showing the number called (even though this is more expensive than using calling cards; calling cards are useless as evidence) - with some cell phones you can also get a printout of the numbers called. Take lots of photos when he visits, including photos showing the both of you with your relatives and friends. Keep proof he visitied you - airline tickets and boarding passes, passport stamps, hotel/restaurant/activity receipts.

Because of the age difference you will have to provide more proof than average that your relationship is genuine. But lots of people have been successful with a large age difference, so it is doable.

[harumi1987]

Definitely do not marry the first time you meet - people who have done that have been accepted, but with a big age gap as well, it will just make things more difficult for you.

Try to have him visit you as often and for as long as possible. When you do get married, make it look special - it doesn't have to be a big ceremony, but it should look like you two really love each other. Have both families there if possible. Try to develop a relationship with his family, and he should try to develop a relationship with yours. Likewise with friends. When he comes visit you, introduce him to lots of relatives and friends, and get proof of this.

Document everything - keep in contact with each other using methods that leave a record: the record of Skype calls can be printed out, emails should be saved, letters are good - and keep the envelope to prove the date, if you phone each other a lot use a land line so you have bills showing the number called (even though this is more expensive than using calling cards; calling cards are useless as evidence) - with some cell phones you can also get a printout of the numbers called. Take lots of photos when he visits, including photos showing the both of you with your relatives and friends. Keep proof he visitied you - airline tickets and boarding passes, passport stamps, hotel/restaurant/activity receipts.

Because of the age difference you will have to provide more proof than average that your relationship is genuine. But lots of people have been successful with a large age difference, so it is doable.

as in every activities we do with family and friends we should have pictures??  if we provided all of that will it be possible for the embassy to believe that the relationship is genuine?

[CharlieD10]

Everything canadianwoman has recommended is sensible advice.

Here's my two cents: get to know your boyfriend a whole lot better before you marry him.  You met online 5 months ago, that's pretty quick time to be talking about marriage.  I realise every relationship has its own timeline, but for your own sake, less for the sake of Immigration, I say you need to take time to get to know him and his family, and let him get to know you and your family.  You are talking about two people from different cultures, possibly different ethnicities, AND with a large age gap.  I'm not saying it won't work, I'm just saying, you need a heck of a lot more time than 5 months to figure out how it will work.