Dude...there are people on here, myself included who would give their right arm to have their families reunited...you really think we're up to giving you advice on how to destroy your own??!
I do agree to what you are saying but unfortunately when the family is asking for money cos i have declined to go to Canada I dont really think I am going to cut my arm over it.....but definitely thanks for your concern.
So I don't really understand what you are mad about.
- Is it about you becoming a household husband when her parents settle in Canada? (
You know you don't necessarily have to live with your in laws family and be a house husband?)
-Or is it about her not telling you about having sponsored her parents? (this is not something you get divorced over)
-or Is it the fact that your wife asked for Divorce? ( now this might be the real issue)
With distance relationships can sometimes drift and I think you can give it another shot by going there and seeing how things are before you think of divorce. Maybe this is why she didn't tell you because she knew you will be mad?
Just take a deep breath and relax. When you are mad you are not able to think straight and this sounds like you just have a genuine relationship but it is falling apart due to lack of communication. If she didn't want to sponsor you she didn't have to (having to remarry to get the certificate etc).
thanks a lot....it actually felt a lot better when i read your post...
- It's about not being told anything and everything being kept a secret....they expect me to move to canada and then her parents come over and everyone lives happily everafter....I have parents as well who need to be taken care of.... what about them....my idea to her was since she never wanted to come to spain and I didnt want to go to Canada...i had suggested a third country where we both made our sacrifices and started fresh...but she said no to that as well...so that didnt leave me with much of a choice....I know I dont have to live with them in the same house but since they are coming all the way from India and they do not know a single soul it's pretty obvious there is no one to take care of them....it will just be a matter of time since everything will be according to their whims and fancies....
- The problem I think has been the involvement of her family in all this....thr was nuthing wrong between me and my wife .....all of a sudden everything started to fall apart and we started fighting over the stupidest of issues...i understand distance creates problems and that relationships needs time to solve such issues but it's her attitude that has changed ....then comes the reason of her parents asking for alimony...which is ridiculous ...why should I have to pay money for not going to Canada...
I kno I am might sound revengeful etc....but this is what I am mad about .....and its definitely not how I wanted to end a 8yr relationship....but if i do have to pay her alimony then I might as well contact the right authorities if thr are any....
Wait, what? I'm confused.
You purport your wife to have breached the law by providing false documents - which, taking aside what frankly (to me) seems to be rather interpersonal problems with your in-laws, and the perceived affront to your virility ("house husband", like it's a bad thing) - is a serious problem, yet the way you come across indicates, to me, that this is borne of vengeance rather than actual concern for the law. Let's keep in mind what she wants is to be with her family, and what person doesn't?
You can report your suspicions to the embassy, I suppose; however, bearing in mind that you didn't even know about your wife applying to bring her parents over (and I agree, it's not something to divorce over), you will need to back up your claims.
Finally, again I agree with the above. My fiancée and I have a long-distance relationship. They are hard, as many in these forums will tell you. They need a lot of nurture, a lot of empathy, care and time, and above all communication. Work it out and talk to her instead of sabotaging the application, you're just shooting yourself in the foot RE: your marriage.
Thanks Samwell for your post - See my in-laws have always advised ( even when not asked for) about how canada is a nice place etc....I wasn't bothered back then as I was happy with my life in Spain... now since i found out that this was all part of a plan it makes me feel that they have taken me for a ride.... like before the Interview came I decided not to go for it....my wife went into my inbox and replied to the embassy...my in-laws started calling incessantly to go for the interview etc. I found out 3 days ago that they have applied for thr PR in 2010 and not my wife or neither my in-laws have ever mentioned this to me even when our relationship was absolutely fine (Problems started happening since may 2010)...I had a gut feeling about this and had asked my wife a lot of times abt her parents immigration etc to which she had denied everytime by saying no they will never leave India etc....but when I actually found evidence (entire application on my old laptop's hard drive) I was amazed....I havent spoken to my wife in 6 months thus making everything else so complicated.... I was up for a divorce for mutual consent but when the element of an out of court settlement came in I was like why should I get some justice as well......
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